A Favour that pays
by SlateSins
Summary: Will Taylor be able to keep his word to Ray Steel and keep his God Daughter safe? Ana left orphaned at 17 has no where to go, no one to turn to until her Uncle T comes to her rescue, but has she escaped one monster for another when she ends up taken in by Taylor and Gail who happen to work for and live with the dark and damaged Christian Grey?
1. Chapter 1

**Disclaimer, I do not own any characters of this story property of E.L James**

**C.P.O.V**

**"Taylor,,,Taylor!" God dam that man has been pushing his good luck and my patience this last week, what the fuck has got him distracted? I know dam sure all is good with him and Gail, I like to fuck but shit, he can make Gail scream as loud as my Subs and this last week there has been no respite for my ears,,, hmm maybe I should offer to sound proof their bedroom. I am not a jealous man but he is getting it better than I am at the moment and its starting to grate on my last nerve.**

**I know I should get rid of Lelia, she can sure take a cane like no one else but I may as well be fucking a dead body half the weekend, seems like she can't get off without pushing me to my limits, I don't draw blood but she has been begging for some harsh stuff that tests even my own sadistic limits. This weekend gone I only managed to bring myself to fuck her once and used her mouth the remainder of my time with her, give that one an inch and she takes the whole fucking lot, I refuse to turn myself into a bigger monster than I already am.**

**Fuck it " TAYLOR!" I hear the staff quarters door open with harsher force than usual, sounds like someone is running late again, the man is too good to let go, we don't even have to talk, just a look sometimes and he knows what I am thinking so I have to get to the bottom of what's been eating him this week one way or another, I am sick of listing to a rush sorry whenever he pulls his head out his ass.**

**Taylor rounds the corner into the kitchen like he has had main lined strong coffee all night and he looks like shit, I have never seen this man ruffled apart from when his daughter was rushed to hospital last year with appendicitis, this man is the definition of taciturn and reserved,, cool even, he needs to sort whatever this shit is out, pronto.**

**I raise my eyebrow as I stand there leaning against the breakfast bar finishing my coffee. **

**"Apologies Sir, I had a personal problem I couldn't ignore this morning, I need to talk to you at some point today about my situation whenever you are free of course"**

**Shit he looks nervous, so nervous its starting to make me feel agitated, however he kept me waiting so I take my sweet time and make a meal out of the last dregs of my coffee as he stands waiting for an instruction,, the cheeky fuckers jaw clenches and I see a slight glint of frustration pass his face before the famous 'Taylor' mask of indifference gets pulled out of the well trained Ex Marines working brain, he knows I caught that look and the cover look, I invented that fucking look I know it well. **

**We stare it out briefly and he does something I have never seen him do, or even thought I would ever see him do and that is look down at his shoes. Fuck! whatever this 'situation' is its serious and it looks like he may need a big fucking favour or is that shame? I can't read him at the moment, I am slightly embarrassed for the man, he is like solid granite, out weighs me by 25lbs to the additional 4 inches on me, he is probably one of a small few in the US who could take me out and is the best security manager I have ever met, that's why he is my go to guy, he has never let me down but by the looks of him today something has shifted and I can see a weakness, that granite has a crack in there somewhere, by the end of today we shall find out and sort this shit because I need Taylor back, not pussy Taylor, I need the man I hired 3 years ago back, like 6 days ago.**

**I decide to take pity on him, " Taylor we need to get going, since the run this morning was not on as you were absent I need to get to GEH earlier today so call Claude and fit him in with me at lunch time and again at 7 tonight, we can talk about your,,,, situation on the way to work if that is enough time?" He nods at me " Yes sir, but I will need Ryan to drive so I am not distracted while we talk, I don't want to get into an accident on the way. "**

**Well at least his brain isn't completely scrambled and its actually doing its job, keeping me safe, even if it is a little overkill, " sounds fine, get Ryan downstairs ready in 5."**

**I head back to my study to collect the stress ball Mia got me for Christmas last year, She told me it had sound effects whenever it hit something so I could get the same effect and not break half a dozen coffee cups each day at work, its the best present I have received to date, Flynn found it fucking hysterical when I told him in the New Year and started to hand them out to certain patients. If this morning is anything to go by I have a strong feeling I may well need this today, hell, I may need to drop a hint for Mia to get me a new one for each 10K I drop on her shopping sprees.**


	2. Asking the devil

**C.P.O.V**

**We've been in the car 2 minuets and the vibrations coming from Taylors bouncing leg has my head hurting already, what the fuck could make him this unsettled, I almost don't want to hear it but fuck here it comes, he is shifting and rubbing his neck like a man who's been caught with his pants round his ankles, **

**" Spit it the fuck out Taylor, we haven't got long " he clears his throat as he turns and sits dead still looking me dead in the eye, I breath a little deeper than I expected and a brief thought flits through my mind ' shit he's quitting, he's leaving, fuck!' **

**T.P.O.V**

**Shit the boss is pissed, I can't blame him and to be honest I'm surprised we have managed to dance around my lack of attention to detail for this long, this is not my MO, but last Sunday changed my priorities and despite trying my best to juggle this extra unexpected situation it is clearly not working, I can't keep it to myself anymore and Gail gave me the push I needed to ask for this mammoth favour, I respect the boss and I get paid to do whatever legal or not, however he is not a guy I want or need to be beholden to.**

**I am trying to find a comfortable stance sitting aside him, the words are sticking in my throat when he cuts the tension with his frustration, the time is ticking and suddenly I remember my promise, the most important promise I have ever made to the one man I wished was my father and the unease that was thoroughly coursing through my veins disappears my heart beat settles and my mind is focused, I clear my throat and man up,**

** " Sir, firstly I want to sincerely apologise for not giving my position my full attention this last week, as you know it is not how I normally operate and I feel uncomfortable that I haven't been on the ball. "**

**The boss nods and wave his hand like he wants me to get on with it, but I know dam well I will pay for this week in one way or another, another deep breath, **

**" As you know Sir, I served as a Marine, The reason I got into the Marines is because of one man a great man, a Mr Ray Steele, he was like a father to me, he was a wise man who taught me everything I know and them some.**

**Unfortunately he was killed last Sunday, shot in the head when he answered his front door.**

**Shit this is harder than I thought, saying that out loud cuts me to the bone, I've seen and done some fucked up shit, stuff that would make the boss's hair stand on end but saying those words catches me off guard and I feel my throat tighten, my toes curl up and my nostrils flare. I look over at the Boss and he looks how I feel, his hand stuck in his hair, holding his breath,, before I can continue he speaks up,,**

**" Taylor,, I,, Umm, Shit, I am very sorry for your loss, when's the funeral? You can have whatever time off you need, so long as we are covered, it will be no issue."**

**Wow, I haven't seen this side to the boss before, I wish it wasn't just a funereal I needed to sort out though, I haven't even got to the actual situation, but at his words I feel myself relax slightly and breathing is slightly easier although my eyes start to feel wet, no tears, just wet. Training will kick that soppy shit right out of you but I am human so I leave my eyes wet and continue.**

**" Thank you Sir, I appreciate that very much, however that isn't the end of the situation,"**

**He looks expectant and confused but nods for me to go on.**

**" Well Ray has a Daughter, Step daughter to be exact, however he loved her like his own and adopted her before she was a year old,, She only recently started living with him again after being taken away by her mother to live in Canada when she was 8. I don't have all the details about her life away from Ray, but I have a feeling it wasn't good. The man who shot Ray was his daughters step father a Mr Stephen Thompson, he also strangled and killed her mother 2 weeks ago, it seems he was hell bent on revenge for Ray Steele's daughter leaving almost a year ago. **

**He is currently in Jail so I don't have to worry about him for a while, but,, Sir I am the girls only family, Ray asked me to be her Godfather a long time ago, I made him a promise to protect her, keep her safe and happy if the worst was to happen and well it happened last Sunday.**

**She was also attacked, quite brutally that night before the police got to the house, she has been in a coma this last week and she woke briefly last night which is why I wasn't up for the run Sir."**

**I release a large breath and see the clogs turning in the boss's head, I wait it out, he is clearly running scenarios through his head, just like I have for the past 6 days, I see the moment he comes to the same conclusion I have routinely ended up at and I see a brief look of horror and fear cross his face.**

**" Taylor, are you asking for permission to have this child live at Escala?" **

**His voice is so low I almost didn't hear him, but I can read his lips like he was shouting, he isn't giving anything away as he kept his eyes down.**

**" Sir,, I don't have another option, I can not and will not abandon her, I made a promise and if that means I am no longer in your employ then it shall have to be that way, however I wish to retain my position, but I will need some time to arrange care for her rehabilitation and education when she is ready.**

**There are spare rooms in staff quarters and I would pay rent for her to stay until she goes to college or finds a job."**

**At my last statement his head shoots up, his brow furrows and scrubs his hands across his face and into his hair, he looks at me, " Taylor, how old exactly is this Girl? "**

**" 17 Sir, she will be 18 in September, She has always been academic and enthusiastic about college, a few months ago she was talking about applying to WSU, so she wouldn't be staying long term, 18 months tops, however she is in no state to look after herself at the moment and I can't entrust her care to anyone else."**

**I see him inhale sharply and breath out just as fast whilst telling me, **

**"Well, clearly she will need a lot of care, how long until she is released do you know? "**

**Well this is a better reaction than I had anticipated, still no concrete yes however and I am well aware that you can only push the boss so far even as generous as he is he likes his solitude up in his tower and he probably thinks every 17 yr old girl are just as annoying and testing as Mia, with Ana you couldn't get anyone more opposite as Hurricane Mia, but he doesn't know that yet.**

**" They are hoping to have her released within 2 weeks, she had internal bleeding which has been controlled but also has a broken leg, multiple fractured ribs, fractured wrist, cheekbone and 3 broken fingers as well and cuts, bruises. **

**She will need physiotherapy on site and visits after she is discharged, nothing that will physically affect her long term, but it will take a while to get her back to normal."**

**As I list of the injuries Ana received I can feel the atmosphere turn arctic and hear the leather seats being tested under the boss's hands, his knuckles are white and his head is low, he looks how I felt when the surgeon told me the same list, What I don't tell him is how that fucker burned sweet Ana with cigarettes all over her thighs. I can't tell him that, it seems too personal, Ana doesn't need to be stripped completely of her dignity and I know the boss would freak the fuck out, I don't need him turning to The fucking she devil like he always without fail does when he gets out of sorts, and I would bet money on it that it would be her fucking ugly mug I would see first at Escala tonight if I disclosed that, so I am keeping shtum. **

**I am waiting and start to feel like I have gone through initial training at base camp, my adrenaline is clearly wearing off and I need to eat, I suddenly realise we have stopped, in fact we have been parked here for 15 minutes, I need to get the boss moving, but first I need to know where I stand, where Ana and I stand,,,**

**"I agree Taylor,, I don't think you have a choice,,, I may be a bastard, but I am not a cruel man,, I think so long as we have rules about where this Girl lives and where she is not permitted than She can stay,, I must remind you that my lifestyle needs to remain private, so please ensure that this girl is not exposed to my predisposition, maybe look at security for the entrance and exits for Staff quarters to minimise her interaction. I guess if this Mr Steele trained you Taylor I kind of owe him myself, I need you in your position so take what time you need and get the arrangements made, keep me up to date and any help you need, medical bills, nursing fees etc just put that on GEH accounts. Again, I am sorry for your loss Taylor, he sounds like one of a kind."**

**Thank fuck for that! I thank him and follow his lead into the elevator,, **

**" Taylor, has this girl got a name? "**

**"Anastasia Sir, Miss Anastasia Rose Steele."**

**As the elevator doors close I catch his reflection, he is sombre and looks pained as he breaths out " Anastasia. " **


	3. Chapter 3

**I have been asked to give the ages of characters, Christian is 23 and Ana is 17, nearly 18. There will be time jumps in the future and Ana is not a Rape victim.**

**I made Ana's abuse and history severe as I wanted to shock Christian into developing a protective side to him, serving as a gateway to future emotions that he will struggle with.**

**Thank you for the reviews, this is my first fan fiction story and I am thoroughly enjoying exploring where I can take this story.**

**C.P.O.V**

**Its been 3 1/2 hours since Taylor finally revealed what the problem has been and to say I was shocked is a massive understatement, I am relieved that he isn't going, I can't lose that guy and if it means having this 'Anastasia' live with him and Gail for a while than I will just suck it up.**

**Anastasia, what a beautiful name, I've never met an Anastasia before,,,**

**I must say I am intrigued by my initial feelings about this, at first I really couldn't stand the thought of a teeny bopper, squealing, pink, glittery cacophony of noise being just one door away from my sanctuary, god forbid she caught me with a sub doing,,, well,,, things a young child shouldn't witness.**

**But apparently this girl is Mia's age, so should be perfectly able to follow rules and abide clear boundaries,, unless she is just like Mia,, my whole body shudders, no, no way, they only made one of her,, otherwise there could be no god.**

**Shockingly though, since I've been in my office,, alone, my mind keeps bringing unwanted images of a random Girl battered and bruised, alone and defenceless, covered in blood, her body twisted and cold in a dark corner, I swear I even heard sobbing at one point, what the fuck?!**

**I know Taylor was holding something back about Anastasia, I can't put my finger on what, but whatever it was made his face pail, I hope for the love of god it isn't what I think, but really, if that shithead had time to fuck her body up to that extent than he probably had time to take it further,,,, "FUCK!" "GOD DAM SON OF A BITCH!"**

**I jolt up at the realisation and fucking roar, kick my chair back and start pacing, fuck the stress ball,, anything solid that isn't nailed down in here isn't safe right now.**

**Just as I kick the white leather lounger across the room Claude rushes through the door looking like he is ready for a fight,, just in time, this is what I need, I hope he's brought the firm pads today or he's not going to be able to shake his own dick after taking a piss for a week.**

**" Grey, everything ok in here? ",,, fucker actually looks unnerved and I can't say I blame him,, I feel unhinged and just as I breath in for a response I get a flash of the girl again, hair, all over her bloodied face,, her body covered in a sheen of terror induced sweat, squeezing out a strangled whisper 'stop,,, please stop', Shit,, I close my eyes and breath it out, I need to check myself, get my shit together, channel this white hot rage bubbling under my skin so I can kick some ass,**

**" Claude, thank you for coming at such short notice, give me 5 and I'll be ready."**

**I ignore his comment since everything is clearly not ok, but he doesn't need to know I've been hallucinating the last 3 hours, I pass him by and change as swiftly as possible, by the time I'm out he has the mats down, padded up,, looks pumped up and ready to go, good,, I need this so fucking bad right now.**

**After my second work out with Claude today I head up back home to shower and eat, Since Claude left my office today I have been so busy my mind hasn't wandered off into dangerous territory again which is good, I don't cope well with feelings like this, I was starting to unravel and without a decent distraction I could have well ended up losing my very much needed sense of control and I wasn't going to wait until Lelia turned up tonight to gain it back.**

**I have decided after this weekend to let her go,, we are no longer compatible but I need one last half decent fuck fest before this girl comes to live here, after what she has been through I don't think I would forgive myself if she accidentally walked in on a compromising situation, so after I let Leila go, if I manage to find a decent sub again, all activities will be restricted to my playroom for the foreseeable future.**

**Speak of the devil,, the elevator announces her arrival but I don't look up from my meal which has been going down without me registering any flavour,, I keep my posture upright and slowly cut the pork loin and chew it leisurely as she approaches, I can smell her,, that fake nock off over spicy scent fills my nose making my head start to pound, ruining my meal, she knows not to wear it, I told her last week on her way out. **

**As I glance up briefly I can see a small smirk of defiance and in that moment I realise she has done this to gain a punishment. Last week I was reserved in my treatment of her and she clearly noticed, trying to bait me will not work, however I will punish her for this,, not the way she is accustomed to with me, I chuckle in my head knowing that denying her any relief tonight will push her in a way she doesn't want,, but I know she won't safe word, she will cling to the hope that I will leave harsh red welts on her body as long as she holds out and takes everything I give her.**

**She stops by the breakfast bar and turns her body to me bowing her head, eyes cast down, the corners of her mouth still twitching upwards, so fucking giddy thinking she has topped from the bottom tonight that her face can't hide her anticipation,, a coy" Sir " is all she whispers at me,, God she's so fucking fake, she almost repulses me with her insincerity, that settles a decision for me, unless her mouth is choking on my cock this weekend she will have a fucking ball gag strapped to her vapid head.**

**" Go take a shower Leila, plain soap and be in position in 15 minuets."**

**I don't plan on getting started straight away, I want my sub off her game and uncomfortable, by the time I am done with this one, every part of her body will be sore, including her knees and I will get it done without leaving one single red mark on her well used body, she will be put through some tough positions, sustaining them for the length of time I need will make her muscles burn so hard she will need to be carried out of here by Sunday.**

**After my meal I pad over to my study and finalise the termination contract and arrange for a removal company to arrive on Monday to pack and ship all of Leila's clothes and jewellery and head into my bathroom and enjoy a longer than average hotter than normal shower.**

**45 minuets later I make my way into the Playroom, oh Lelia, lets teach you a true lesson in submisson.**

**C.P.O.V**

**Well that weekend went by rather satisfactorily, Lelia's reaction when I handed her the termination was priceless, unhappy is a serious understatement, she shredded all the bedding, smashed the bathroom mirrors, upturned all the furniture in the sub room and left all the taps on before she left.**

**I can't say I blame her, she didn't get what she wanted from this weekend, I fucked her ass the whole time, pausing just to let her clean my dick with her mouth, no canes, no paddles no whipping, no orgasm for her, just ropes, cuffs and pounding that ass in every twisted position my mind could come up with and when I ordered Taylor to come and remove her she begged at my knees, proclaimed her love for me, told me I wouldn't find a sub like her ever again, that I would miss her and well,,, I tuned out the rest to be honest.**

**I was in true Dom mode and simply sniggered, told her to stop embarrassing herself, Christ she has no shame, before the elevator doors shut she tore her shirt open and screamed her body is mine, and that I belong to her.**

**Fuck that, she clearly has a screw loose and kept it well hidden while under contract.**

**I need to tell Elena to vet the subs she sends me a little more thoroughly, I can't have a situation left like that to clean up again, not that I got my hands dirty of course, but Gail had better things to do than sort that crap out.**

**I like clean breaks and although this weekend sated my appetite it was slightly marred by the mess she left behind. **

**Taylor has been back on form since our chat, we have a few new security people, Luke Sawyer who is built like a fucking wall, nicknamed the Beast which is clear to see why, he is more imposing than Taylor if you can believe someone like that exists and Jake Reynolds younger, less imposing but apparently has the highest sniper tally record in the US. They are working to cover his visits to the hospital and I can't complain, two of his best guys according to their records and trusted by Taylor they seem to be working out so far so that is one less thing I have to worry about.**

**I haven't asked any more about the situation, he seems to be back to the old Taylor and that's what I needed so I will rely on him to update me as and when.**

**Since Leila's departure I haven't had any more unwanted visions of the Girl,**

**I am back on my game and work is going well, closed three acquisitions since Monday which will end up netting GEH a sound £300mil over the next 2 yrs and now I am here waiting in my club like every Thursday for Elena to show up for our Lunch meeting.**

**She is always late, I think she likes the idea of keeping me waiting, she knows I hate it, but since I haven't subbed for her these last two years gone she likes to play a few power games, trying to top me again but we both know who wears the pants here so I indulge her once in a while and don't complain when she trots into the bar 20 minuets late with that smug grin plastered on her face after all she taught me all I know about my lifestyle which I highly rely on and she loaned me the start up money for GEH which I will be forever grateful for.**

**I hear unremarkable click of manolo blanik stilettos coming from the entrance and stand up as she stalks her way over to our table, **

**" Hello Darling, sorry I was caught up at the salons, someone failed to look at the date of a coupon, silly little girl, no amount of primping and waxing was going to sort that hot mess out anyway, the least she could do was pay the actual bill for making her look half human, " She chuckles as she air kisses me and smoothes her dress down before I pull out her chair.**

**" I am glad you managed to sort your problem out Elena, I am in a hurry so I took the liberty and ordered for us both, "**

**" Of course darling, I know you are a very busy man, so I heard that Leila is out, got a bit clingy did she?" she can barely contain her laughter while she sips on her wine.**

**" You could say that, I have no time or need for 'more' and frankly I think she is one sandwich short of a picnic, I need you to vet these girls a little bit more thoroughly from now on , the mess she left behind was unnecessary, I need someone who isn't going to go bat shit when their time comes to an end, its not as if they get tossed out like trash with nothing to show for their effort for fucks sake and if they behave they get what they need in the playroom, it is not a difficult arrangement to understand. "**

**I sigh exasperated with the knowledge that this seems to be a pattern with my subs, none of them have tipped over into psychoville like Leila, however they always inevitably end up falling for me, desperately wanting to cling on to the arrangement for as long as possible.**

**If they knew the real me, knew how dark my soul is then no amount of money or how well I fucked them would stop them from running as fast as their lithe bodies could manage.**

**" Well dear, I did train you, and you were my best student, the very best and they know it! You fuck like the Master you are and Of course with that face and your money they can't help but imagine the lifestyle that your money and success can afford them, don't let them trick you, people like us can't be loved and we certainly are not capable of giving it , its not what we are made for and anyone who tells you differently is a soppy, weak fool.**

**All there is to life is Power, success and a good hard, rough fuck."**

**She stares at me, in silence as the waiter sets down our plates, she holds my gaze and she starts on her grilled chicken salad, chewing slowly she finishes her bite and smiles, she knows I've heard this before, her speech is pulled out at every moment of conflict, whenever I question what she does for me, she knows what I really want to hear though, so I wait until she relents.**

**" I will happily delve further into the psyche of each potential sub I have lined up for you Christian, I will start by rejecting any Liberals, Artists and multiple cat owners, how about that? "**

**She is looking quite smug right now, she obviously doesn't see this as a problem and I find her attitude facetious.**

**"Elena, just get it done, I need clean breaks and minimal fuss, make sure they have good recommendations from previous Doms, I don't need a rooki sub, get me a fucking professional, someone well seasoned in what I need, with your connections I doubt that is too much of a stretch for you, or do I need to start sourcing them myself? " I raise my eyebrow and her jovial mood dissipates as quickly as I finish my last mouthful of wine.**

**"Now now Christian, no need to be so rash, rest assured you will be satisfied with the next selection I bring to your attention, judging by your mood you are sorely in need of someone asap. I shall send over my list in the next few days, we don't want you tensed up for long now do we."**

**That's all I wanted to hear and now it has been said I need to get on with my day.**

**"I look forward to your email Elena, I will leave you to enjoy the rest of your meal, please order dessert if you wish, on the house of course. "**

**I lean down and kiss her cheek goodbye, button my jacket and head back to GEH.**


	4. Chapter 4

**T.P.O.V**

**The boss just got back to GEH as I was heading to the hospital, Ana is doing a lot better physically, mentally,,, shit, I am not so sure, she can't maintain eye contact, her usually bright blue eyes have been replaced with a vacancy I am all to familiar with, its the same look that has graced my fellow servicemen time and time again when they finally witnessed the true horrors of combat.**

**She hasn't said a word since she woke up 12 days ago, she just hums a tune, its childlike and melodic, if anyone interrupts her she shuts her eyes and starts from the beginning.**

**Her tears are silent and relentless, I don't know how she hasn't dried up, surely there must be a limit to how much someone this small can cry? But she defies physics as I watch tears still trickle out from underneath her eyes as she sleeps.**

**Watching her slight frame twist and jerk away from an insidious memory of that**

**sick fuck breaks my heart, I can't keep her safe from what she remembers, no amount of security and good memories will wipe that day from her head, its a life sentence forced on her, branded on her brain just like those burns he left on her thighs.**

**I feel powerless, I can't do the one thing that would make her life right again in an instant. I can do a lot of things, but turning back the clock is beyond my capabilities so I will have to pull every resource I have out of my ass and hope, pray and keep my fingers crossed that I can help her rebuild herself, get back my little Annie, get back that brightness, make sure she lives with happiness and hope again otherwise I am in for a serious beat down when my time is up and Ray will be surely waiting for me if I fail.**

**I walk over to her, she's still twitching, grunting out and gasping at whatever image is being replayed, I stroke her hair so gently, its not been brushed, she won't let anyone touch her without being sedated, so I get as close to her as I can and whisper " Baby Girl, Annie, your safe baby girl, shhhhhhhh, you're ok, you're ok Annie, Sleep, Happy dreams Annie, I'll come see you soon ok, shhhhhhhh. "**

**For a brief moment her face is rested, her breathing is smooth and I am flooded with relief, I go to leave and as I reach the door Ana lets out the most guttural cry of terror I've ever heard, it rips through me like a thousand bullets, my body crouches from instinct to escape it, adrenalin tares through me at breakneck speed, this cry calls to my most basic need to protect despite the fact that it also scares the shit out of me, I turn back to get to her and watch with heartbreak as she thrashes against air, her hands pinned to the bed, fisted hands white and seized unable to move them because he had cuffed her down when the police found her.**

**Her throat is closing up, and it's making her cries sound like a wounded animal, a deep NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO, wobbles out of her, her upper body tensed, like there is a current running through her body, " DADDY,,, DADDY,,,DADDY HELP,,, NOOOOOOOOO!" She's desperate and hoarse on the last cry out and I can't take it anymore,, I've been told not to wake her but I can't leave her like this, reliving it over and over, I feel like a cunt standing here watching her pain, doing fuck all apart from call her name, although I've been so unnerved by this I suddenly remember I haven't said a damn thing,**

**"Annie, ANNIE!, ANNIE! Wake up baby girl, wake up!, please come on sweet heart! " I am at her side with my hands hovering over her, unsure where or if I should touch her, she is already broken, like a delicate china doll I need to be careful, I can't risk making her nightmare anymore real by allowing her to feel the touch of my hands on her body so I go to her ear and whisper soothing sounds, I allow my fingers to gently stroke away a few sweaty strands of matted hair now stuck to her forehead. She recoils from my hand but the cries stop, her eyes flutter open, her breathing is still harsh and erratic, her whimpers catching in her chest as she hiccups to regain control she takes stock of where she is and I see the tension leave her.**

**I let out a breath and lower my head, onto her pillow, " Annie, oh Annie it was just a nightmare sweet heart, you're ok now, shhhhhhhh."**

**She's staring into down past her toes, her face raw from salty tears that still refuse to stop, she shudders in a breath like it hurts and croaks out in the voice of an 8yr old Annie I once knew " Daddy? I need my Daddy,, please get my Daddy, is he ok?"**

**Its the first conscious words I have heard pass her lips and it tells me what I feared the most, she hasn't been here the last 12 days, everything has passed her by, on auto pilot she has just been laying here surviving, existing, oblivious to what I had to regrettably tell her the second time she woke up.**

**I know deep down she heard that gun shot, and somewhere inside, she knows that the only reason Ray isn't here instead of me is that he is gone but her mind is skewed, her brain has refused to acknowledge the only truth that is certain in her world now, Ray is not ok, he can't come and make this right yet I find the words unwilling to come out, I don't want to be the one to shred that last strand of desperate hope she is clinging to.**

**All I can manage is a soft " Annie, I'm so sorry baby girl, "**

**The words register, her lips contort into a shaky grimace as she turns her face away from me as if she can escape what I've just admitted.**

**Holding in the grief her body starts to shake and tremble, devastation washes over her and in that moment I've never hated myself more.**

**I want to hold her, encase her, protect her with my arms, stroke and cuddle the pain away for her, but I know it would make her worse right now.**

**Just as her sobbing escalates a nurse comes in with a concerned look gracing her face, " Oh, Anastasia, sweetie, here this will calm you down dear, lets get you rested up and ready for your Physiotherapy this afternoon ok."**

**Her voice is soothing for me, her face is round and kind, but Annie doesn't even realise someone is in here with us, she is completely over aught, her brain can not process past the point of what I told her a few moments ago.**

**Annie succumbs to the sedative quickly and within minuets aside from the cuts and bruises scattered over her face and neck she resembles my Annie again.**

**I stand to leave with the nurse and as I do my shirt connects with the sweat on my back, its cool but I feel like my skin is on fire, I realise now how much this has taken out of me, how much Annie is now my responsibility as much as Sophie is.**

**I close Annie's door with a soft click and as I put my jacket back on I see Dr Grace Trevelyan - Grey, the bosses mother coming towards me down the corridor.**

**She is the kindest woman aside from Gail of course that I have ever met, the fact that her son is one of the coldest SOB's I have ever met in my life has had me questioning what horrific shit his life was like before he was adopted for as long as I've known him.**

**Whatever it was, clearly the pure goodness that seeps out of Dr Grace wasn't quite enough to heal the damage done in those early years, at least he isn't a murdering psychopath, although If the Grey's found out how he likes to whip, cane and beat little brown haired women before he fucks them bow legged until they can't sit down then I doubt they would find it any more comforting than if he was a bloodthirsty killer, at least his subs sign up knowing full well what they are asking for, but still its not what you want for your baby boy now is it.**

**"Taylor, is everything Ok? is Christian alright, he's not here with you is he? "**

**Poor woman, she loves the boss like he is still a snot nosed little kid, the concern on her face is unmoving as she tries to peer around my shoulder into Annie's room, trying to get a handle on what's wrong, **

**" Hello Dr Grey, no Mr Grey is not here, I am visiting someone, sorry to worry you unnecessarily, I will let him know that I bumped into you though, is there anything I can do for you before I leave?"**

**She visibly relaxes but looks concerned about the person behind the door, **

**" No of course not Taylor, I am fine, just came down here to cover someone else's rounds, I will be meeting your friend shortly, I hope he is ok, nothing too serious? "**

**" No mam, in fact it's my God daughter, Anastasia, she lost her father and was attacked in her home, she is coming to live at Escala while she recovers and gets ready for University next year, I am her only family left but Mr Grey has been incredibly helpful in keeping me on while I attend to Annie. "**

**" Oh, I am so sorry Taylor, what a horrid situation, I will make sure she is very comfortable, I will keep an eye on her while she is here, if you need any help when she leaves please don't hesitate to ask, she will probably need as much help as she can get poor girl. "**

**" Thank you mam, sorry to cut this short, but I need to get back to GEH, I am grateful for your help, she is not in a good way at the moment so please let me know if she gets too upset while I am gone, thank you "**

**"Of course Taylor, you needn't have asked, please let Christian know to be expecting my call. "**

**I nod to her as I leave, feeling like a small weight has been lifted from my heavy shoulders, with Grace looking over Annie I know I will be called as soon as she needs me.**

**On my way back to pick up the boss I call Gail and let her know that Annie will be released by Monday, I need to get a room ready for her coming home, luckily each bedroom in the staff quarters has its own bathroom and a small living area off from the sleeping area, its all furnished but I want to make sure she has a few comforts to ease this transaction.**

**I have already bought over some pictures of her and Ray, they are sitting on her bedside table and a patchwork quilt she made for him when he retired from the Marines, for a kid it sure is a detailed piece of work, it must have taken weeks to complete, its shades of blue and grey, she used some of his old worn out uniform to make some patches and the blues remind me of Ray's eyes, virtually the same as Annie's despite not sharing an ounce of physical DNA with each other, they are made from the same stuff, the strongest steel we would joke, but not a truer word could be used to describe this father and daughter.**

**They had the ability to look straight down into the depths of you, unease your core if you had something to hide or cleanse a person inside out when you had a burden to carry.**

**I discovered long ago the just like Ray, Annie is extremely low maintenance, so long as she has a good book to read, warm socks and home cooked food she is,, well,, they used to make her happy, hopefully her books I am having sent over will at least make her feel a little bit more at home, even if they don't bring a smile to her face just yet.**

**I pull into the GEH car park and before I can get a foot on the ground my phone goes, its Sawyer. **

**" TAYLOR, we have a code red in the bosses office, Mr Grey has been stabbed, he's conscious but fuck I can't stop the bleeding, where are you? "**

**Fuck, what the hell has been happening?!, my legs react without my brain engaging and I sprint to the elevator, " I am on my way up, keep him talking and I'll call the paramedics, "**

**" Shit stay where you are Taylor, me and Reynolds are bringing him down, he is refusing the paramedics, Taylor, it was Miss Williams, we have her here cuffed in the rest room, get Dr Flynn over here now. "**

**" Copy that, come straight to the underground parking, no chance of the media catching a whiff of this that way and be quick about it "**

**Shit, this motherfucker better not bleed out on me, he's so fucking stubborn, I knew one day his fucked up lifestyle was going to round back and bite his arrogant ass, well looks like that day has dawned.**

**I knew that one had a screw loose, she had crazy fucking eyes, and seemed happier the more he beat her, she admired cuff marks like they were declarations of an undying love, she reeked of desperation, to the point where I wasn't surprised when she offered me a Blow job for the new access codes when the boss had me turf her out last weekend, when I didn't answer she started getting handsy while I was driving so I simply utilised the privacy screen and reminded her of the NDA restrictions when I dumped her bags on the side walk.**

**I haven't got time for shit like that, as if I would be interested in a used up pain junkie when I have a real woman waiting at home for me, Ugh.**

**With hindsight I realise I should have put a detail on Miss Williams for a few weeks while she cooled down, none of his other subs reacted so severe before, I should have picked up on that, God damn it, I've dropped the ball again and now here I am on my way to Seattle Grace Hospital with the richest man in Washington State bleeding all over the back seat.**

**I look into the rear view mirror and the boss doesn't look so good, he's still awake, but he looks like hell and with his jaw twitching away I can tell he is struggling to keep it together,,**

**" Keep that pressure on Sawyer, call ahead to warn them of our arrival, 2**

**minuets Sir and we will have you at the Emergency department, 2 minuets Sir, Stay with us. "**

**Ok, so a lot of you want Ana and Christian to meet, I promise you I really want that too, but I needed to build it up, it will be worth it in the end I assure you! So, next chapter is what you have been waiting for! Update within 24 hours!**


	5. Chapter 5

**G.P.O.V**

Oh my! please let my boy be ok, I may have over 30 years experience as Doctor but I will eternally be a mother and to hear that my troubled boy Christian has been stabbed and is on his way to me made my blood run cold,, what's taking so long, I wrap my arms around myself as I pace the emergency entrance to stem the panic that's threatening to take over me,,, they said two minuets, they should be here any second, come on Taylor, bring me my boy!

Just as I turn on my heal again Taylor and another man come bursting through the doors My heart stops abruptly in my chest, I am filled with a deep ache as I witness my sweet boy supported between them, blood saturating his shirt, he looks so pale, weak from the blood loss, his feet dragging behind him.

"Oh Christian!" We get him into the closest bay available and I watch as he is assessed by Triage, I am not permitted to treat him here as I am family, I don't truly know if I would be capable right now if I am honest, so I do what I can as his Mother and stand by his head, stroking his hair.

I look down as they cut away his shirt and He has two stab wounds to his left side, smack bang in the middle of his no go zone, oh god, of all the places, this will make treating him so much worse.

I motion quickly to the resident before she can touch him and inform her of Christians haphephobia, she instantly calls for a sedative and restraints but its too late, Christian looses consciousness and he is wheeled swiftly away from me into surgery.

I stand there willing my legs to move in the same direction and as they respond I hear Taylor calling me.

" Mrs Grey, come here, lets sit you down" he shuffles me into a private waiting room, I guess I am not Dr Grey right in this moment, I am Mrs. Grace Grey, mother to his boss and even though Christian wouldn't approve this form of address to me, frankly, the informality is slightly comforting right now.

Taylor pushes a hot cup into my clasped hands and I cling onto it, my body tensed, almost as if I believe that the stronger I hold it the more likely I will get to see my Christian alive again today.

"Taylor, please tell me why my son is laying half dead on an operating table, who would do this, please tell me you know, "

I may be in the early stages of shock, however I can still tell I will not get the full answer from him as he avoids looking me in the eye.

" Ma'am I wasn't there for the actual altercation, I had just arrived back when I was informed about the situation by security, Mr Grey refused the paramedics and frankly I can drive faster, however we were lucky I was in position to leave immediately.

We have private investigators at the scene now, initial reports indicate the attacker to be a disgruntled employee, however it hasn't been confirmed yet, I will keep you in the loop as and when ma'am. "

" Thank you Taylor, please could you call my husband and Elliot, I don't think I can talk to them about this over the phone. "

That's as good as I am going to get, and I am honestly to drained to push him on it, I just want to see Christian so I go and find out which Theatre they have him in, walking down the corridor I feel strange, this place is like a second home to me, yet the closer I get to the operating room the more uncomfortable I feel, I suddenly notice the antiseptic odor that coats every surface despite my nose being dead to it for nearly 30 years, the Tannoy comes on abruptly as I push through the swing doors, I can't tell what noise is coming out of it, which Dr they are asking for, it sounds so garbled, has it always echoed like that?

2 hours have passed and in the meantime Carrick and Elliot have joined me in the seats outside the Theatre, no one has uttered a word for over an hour, I can feel the dread creeping up my spine, I have goose bumps that refuse to be rubbed away. Elliot looks so lost, every now and then he paces up and down, wearing down the floor and stops to cling to me, I wish I could tell him it will be ok, but I am starting to doubt that, 2 1/2 hours have passed since my boy was rushed into the next room, we are in limbo, a horrible world of unknowing.

" Mom, can't we at least go and ask someone how it's going, I don't think I can take much more, "

As I try to search for an answer for my eldest son his and our prayer's are answered.

One of my most trusted and longest serving colleges passes through the doors and reassures us that although it took a while to find the bleed and that he has lost enough blood to require 2 transfusions he has a strong chance at a quick recovery.

", Andrew, Thank you,,,, thank you so very much, when can we see him "

"No problem Grace, Just make sure he gets plenty of rest, even as healthy as he is the blood loss and transfusions will weaken him for the next few weeks, you can see him in about 20 minuets, he is still in recovery at the moment, he will be groggy for the next 12-24 hrs depending on his response to the anesthetic, so I would recommend only immediate family here tonight, sorry" he chuckles softly, " Grace of course I forget you know all this, please forgive me, I am off shift now however I have notified the ward to call me in if he needs to go back into surgery, although that's highly unlikely."

Carrick and I both thank him again and wish him a good night, after a group hug and a few tears of relief all three of us walk down to the private room and to my surprise, Taylor my sons right hand man is already guarding his door.

C.P.O.V

HOLY SHIT, ARGGHHH, that fucking hurts! I feel heavy, like a lead brick pressing on my chest, my next breath is shallow trying to avoid that sharpness that just kicked the shit out of me, at least I'm alive, last thing I remember is the sheer panic starting to bubble up when I realised they were going to touch my chest, good fucking thing I passed out, not that I could have fought anyone off me at that point but my brain would of still registered the searing pain at anyone's hand connecting.

As my inital rush wares off slightly my ears focus on the unmistakable voice of my mother and It moves me to find the strength to open my eyes, there she is, my angel, the one woman I don't deserve but god am I grateful she believes otherwise.

"Mom, hey,, I'm Ok Mom" I croak out, my throat is on fire, dry like its packed with sawdust.

" I will get you some water darling, don't try to move ok, just stay still,, she turns to dad who gives her a cup with a bendy straw in it, and the shock must be evident on my face, I haven't spoken to my father more than a handful of times since I dropped out of Harvard 2 years ago, but here he is I feel a little embarrassed about how we last left things, it wasn't a calm or productive meeting lets leave it at that.

"Hello son, glad to see you awake, you had us all scared to death for a good while " he pats my leg through the sheet and I can see he is holding back tears, I don't want them to worry about me, I don't deserve this display of loyalty and love so I down play it.

" No need to panic, just a little nick Dad, you worry too much "

Both he and Mom scoff at me while I sip my water, god that is good, a mini Oasis just what I needed, I don't even have the energy to hold the fucking cup so Mom takes it away to refill when its evident I am a thirsty mother fucker.

I can feel my eyes dropping slowly, I fight it off for as long as I can, just long enough to see Elliot walk in and drop the bag he was carrying,

" Bro, thank fuck for that! Don't ever scare the shit out of me like that again, what the hell happened?" He grabs my head with both of his dusty fucking bear paws and gives me a hard pressed kiss to the top of my head, he has always been overtly affectionate, and because he can't hug me I guess I will let this slide,, it kinda felt good though, I hate that it makes me feel cared for but right now I need it.

" You look like shit though dude, even your pretty face can't make a ass peepin gown look good " he winks at me and there is the Elliot Grey I know all too well, I can't even tap him from here and he knows it, he's going to milk this, hell I bet he even gets some sympathy pussy about me tonight, lucky fucker.

I smile sleepily up at him and raise my eyebrow, " just you wait Fuckface, I will be keeping a tally, be ready!"

We all laugh, well I try, but it hurts too much to mask the pain and I know how much my mom has been though today just by the fact she hasn't called me and my brother out for cursing, that will probably never happen again, she looks so exhausted and sleep is creeping up on me quickly so I tell them to go home and get some rest, I can see the outline of Taylor at my door, I am safe for now, I can't keep my eyes open any longer, but I feel three sets of lips press on my forehead separately and I drift off before the door can click closed.

I wake up and I can't tell what time of day it is, I haven't got my phone with me so I call out to Taylor but it's Sawyer who enters instead,

"Where's Taylor?, What's the time? "

"He was called to help contain a situation with his God Daughter an hour ago, Its 10:21 Sir, here, your phone is fully charged and Gail is brining by a late breakfast for you since she doubted you would want hospital food, anything else you need Sir? "

"Whats the handle on Miss Williams Sawyer? was Flynn able to see her?"

"Yes Sir, all of that has been taken care of, Dr Flynn is having her assessed in an out of state facility he told me he would contact you after 48 hrs "

good I can't afford to let it get out that I was stabbed by an ex sub, not only would It expose me as a sexual deviant to my family and business associates but I would loose my footing as top Dom of Washington State, what kind of Alpha Male gets put in hospital by a 120lb skinny ass bitch? See, too much at risk here, so no, she will stay put, get treatment and everyone that matters will be none the wiser.

If she comes at me again in the future not only will she pay the price but her whole fucking family for generations to come will live under my oppressive far reaching shadow.

"Thank you Sawyer, let me know when Taylor gets back"

Who's this strolling in looking like a Cheshire fucking cat? She's got scrubs on so Its a safe bet to assume she' the lucky nurse who won the raffle on who gets to change my catheter bag, pathetic.

"Mr Grey, Good morning " she flutters he eyes briefly at me but she's so aroused she can't maintain eye contact, god I don't need this crap the day after surgery.

" Good morning, can I ask what the schedule is for today, when are rounds? " my voice is cold and reserved but she doesn't notice, she doesn't hear the edge to what I am saying, too distracted by my face just like every other red bloodied female past puberty in Seattle, she's like a fucking magpie when something shiny catches it's attention, I sigh " Ms, the schedule, am I due any tests today? "

"Oh yes, ummm, lets see what your chart says,,, ah, yes, well looks like we are taking you up to radiology for a scan to make sure the bleed is contained and to check again for any potential organ damage, I will just give you your pain meds first, have you eaten? "

"No, not yet "

"Good, its best to wait until after a scan it can make you feel uncomfortable sometimes after surgery and you will need to remain completely still for the CT scan, but they will instruct you when we get you up there ok?"

She's too fucking chipper for me right now, too over friendly, but I guess its better than getting a nurse Ratched type, I can just tune her out for now.

" That should be fine Nurse, thank you. "

She changes my bag of piss, _you couldn't pay me enough to do that and its my own piss._

Gives me my meds and checks my IV before we head up to the elevator.

I feel like such a pussy getting wheeled in my hospital bed, in a 'ass peepin gown' as Elliot so delicately put it, I am vulnerable and I feel uneasy, the same feeling I would get before going on a carnival ride but without the excitement.

Sawyer is waiting with me, the nurse and the porter for the double elevator to stop, the doors open and I look up to see Taylor huddled over a small balled up figure on a hospital bed just like me.

I had forgotten about Taylor's God daughter with all the chaos of yesterday it completely slipped my mind.

I get wheeled in and Taylor goes to move so the end on my bed doesn't crush him against the opposite door, he still hasn't seen me, his eyes and body creating a protective barrier between the girl and everything else, I can hear him whispering to her and I feel like I am intruding, I get my phone and start to flick through random emails just to avoid the feeling of being a voyeur.

"T man " Sawyer pipes up from behind the head of my bed and I see Taylor turn just his face, still blocking my view of the girl, she seems so small, looks like a child wrapped up in her parents bed.

" Sawyer, thanks for the cover, Sir, you are looking much better, can't say I want a repeat of yesterday anytime soon "

He looks rough, he hasn't shaved and he is still wearing the suit from yesterday, I can see my blood speckled across his side, not a lot, but I know what it is.

" No, yesterday was not my best day, but thank you for getting me here Taylor. Gail is bringing over a late breakfast soon, will you be seeing her?"

"Gail?" whispers the girl and my eyes dart to find her face,

" Yes baby girl, do you want to see Gail, she would love to see you again, she's been asking to come, is that ok?"

Taylor looks fucking giddy, he's smiling, but its an unsure smile like this girls reaction has the power of C4 explosives.

She doesn't respond verbally but I can see her motion a nod against him, his smile widens and a tear runs down and he leaves it there, so happy he doesn't care all of us have seen.

I decided to take control here, It would be good to meet the girl if she is going to be living at Escala.

" Is this Anastasia Taylor? Its nice to meet you Ana," I sit up as Taylor nods to me and moves to the side, as she comes into view I see someone so broken, she looks younger than nearly 18, she's so small and thin, I can see her collar bones protruding like sharp reminders of how long ago she ate her last soild meal, I am guessing at least a week.

Her hair is messed up and dirty, hasn't Taylor been looking after her? No, that can't be it, he clearly loves this girl, he wouldn't leave her in this state by his own choice.

She's staring at me, her eyes are almost black, red rimmed and puffy but I see a thin line of blue iris, just like the flower, almost violet, very unusual,, unique.

I push myself forward and extend my hand to her, shit,

I was so distracted from soaking up all of these little things about Anastasia I didn't clock the fear spread across her face until I heard the most ear splintering scream that made the hairs on the back of my neck stand, a painful lump lodges itself in my throat and I am stuck watching such a shocking display of terror I can't even look away.

"NOOOOOOO! DON'T TOUCH ME, PLEASE STOP, DON'T TOUCH ME, STAY AWAY, NO, NO, NO, NO, NO, NO, NOOOOOOOOO, HELP ME, HELP ME PLEASE"

She's clawing at Taylor, trying to climb up past him, using him as a shield, like a wild animal, her wide eyes never leaving mine, as if she sees the devil in them, It chills me and for the first time in my life I feel like someone knows me, the real me, the sick fuck who beats women who look just like this girl, I'm sure its no coincidence, she's like a mirror, showing me the first honest guttural reaction to what I truly am, a twisted as fuck sadist. She knows it, I can feel it all over my body, her eyes boring straight into me like a hot knife through rancid butter.

Validating everything I've ever thought about myself and what I've accepted to be the truth about my infested dark soul.

I can't keep her gaze any longer, Its as if my eyes are powering her reaction, maybe if she can't see what my eyes tell her she will calm down, I feel ashamed I have created more pain for this innocent girl, she looks worn down and empty, so vacant and really, truthfully I wish I was good enough to comfort her right now, but I would rather cut off my own arms than inflict myself on her and cause more grief that her tiny body wouldn't be able to manage with.

She's simply too good, too pure to taint her with myself in anyway.

I apologise to Taylor with my eyes as he holds her tight trying to stop her from falling of the bed, still sobbing into his neck, holding onto his shirt collar, her knuckles are white from the strength of her grip, the fear of me powering her small frame into the strongest flight reaction I've ever witnessed.

As I try to reach out again to apologise, Taylor puts his hand up to block me and shakes his head slightly, I've been shut down, I am defeated and as The elevator

doors open I feel the heat rise from my chest up past my neck until it pricks my eyes, I am wheeled out and before the doors close on the unforgettable scene before me she turns to me with tears silently running behind her closed lids she mouths "sorry " her eyes blink open and as she sees I caught her unwarranted apology her hands shoot up to cover her lips just as the doors shut.

I breath deep, it hurts, but nowhere near as much as not being able to help Anastasia, "sorry" what does she have to say sorry for, sweet girl.

Maybe, maybe she doesn't hate me, maybe I can help fix her, just a little piece at a time,, for the first time in a long time I feel a tiny flutter of Hope beating somewhere in my chest, "sorry",, maybe it wasn't me, next time I will keep my hands to myself, I can understand that, I want her trust, I want her to be ok with me, I want to see that face smile, no one that young and sweet should live without smiling, that's it, if I only do one thing for Anastasia, it will be to bring back her smile,, I can't wait to see what it looks like.


	6. Chapter 6

Sorry for the lack of updates Guy's, but December and January are busy months for me, lots of family Birthday's, anniversary's and of course Christmas.

Thank you so, so much for the reviews, they mean a lot to me and I love reading them, so please continue to do so!

T.P.O.V

Shit! the day was going so much better than expected, I should have warned the boss about Annie, I hope he doesn't take it to personally, she won't even let me touch her unless she is distressed and I can tell that even in her desperation it causes her pain which makes me feel useless.

I know she trusts me but as her Dr said, she will need time to feel safe with eye and body contact.

The stutter is new, however her Dr told me it will go once she regains her confidence, unless it causes her more distress we are not to address it and absolutely in no way are we to hurry her or correct her in any way which is fine by me, I would wait all day to just hear her get out one word at the moment, this is going to take time and I've got plenty of that.

Thank god Gail is coming soon, I think Annie needs a motherly type of figure, the only person she's talked to willingly is Grace, she has that something about her that Annie opened up to momentarily, she even allowed her to change the dressing on her thighs without a sedative which was at risk of becoming infected, she knows no one else has been able to get near Annie and I am not going to lie, I was petrified thinking about how I was going to get Annie to let me or a nurse look after her injuries when she comes home so I was fucking relieved when she offered to look after her burns when she gets discharged, that woman is all angel as far as I am concerned.

The look on her face when she finished dressing Annie's legs was one of devastation, she's seen all manner of fucked up nasty shit done to kids and I know from my work outs with the boss that he has burn marks as well so I know its as personal for her as it is for me.

Annie has finally calmed down from the interaction in the elevator, she's exhausted, but something is eating away at her, I can hear her thinking, she turns my way but doesn't look at me, she's wringing her hands with the handkerchief Grace gave her,

"Un, Uncle T,,,,,,, wh, who, wa,,, wasss, th, th, that,, ma,,maaaann"

Fuck! the first time she's speaking to me properly and its about the boss!"

I can't help it, even if I have to talk about the shithead and she can barely get the words out I am so fucking happy she's talking, I start grinning like a loon.

" Well, sweetheart, he's actually my boss, when you come to live with me and Gail, we will be staying in the staff quarters in his apartment."

She flinches and almost raises her eyes to mine until her instinct wins over and her eyes lower once again, there's a small v forming between her eyebrows just as she brings her knees up into the foetal position, hugging herself,

" I, I, I di, didn't, mmmm,,,mmmeann it,,, I, I, s,s sa,saw h,h, him, in, inst,, instead,,, ss, ss, ssoorry."

The tears are flowing silently again, I didn't know she saw that fucker whenever someone came near her, I should have known.

" Baby girl, it's ok, my boss understands ok, he won't bother you, you'll hardly ever

see him, he's always at work and I won't let anyone come near you again, not until you're ready, you don't need to apologise for anything ok?"

She nods, wipes her nose with the hanky, I can tell she's going to drop off any minuet soon, physiotherapy and the panic attack have really taken it out of her today.

Just as I think she has drifted off she jolts as I stand and ready myself for another nightmare but it doesn't come, Annie sits up, her arms wrapped around herself, head down with her crazy hair blocking her face, she cocks her head slightly as if she has had an epiphany.

" H, h, he's hu, hurt, l, l, liiike,, mm,, mmee. "

I don't even need to ask, I know she saw the boss, just like Ray, not much gets past her,, She isn't talking about the reason why he is in hospital, she looked straight at him and saw something.

I don't want her curious about him, but I can't lie, I am grateful that I know she is discrete like her father,

I take a quick breath and flatly answer, "Yes Annie, he is." I don't need to elaborate.

Annie lays back down, her breathing even and its as if she has found a small sliver of peace knowing she's not alone.

I crack the door open and before I slide out I whisper,

"Get some rest Baby girl, I'll be back soon."

C.P.O.V

"Mom, seriously, I am ok, the scan came back clear, I feel a lot better, I should be going home tomorrow, I will call you if I need any help, I know you've got the nightshift and you're still finishing bits off for the valentines ball at the weekend, if you don't get enough rest you will end up in here as a patient."

I give her my best smile, its half genuine, I love my mom, but I want to be alone, when she finds out I am answering work emails she will give me the 'glare of grace' look I became so accustomed to during my formative years and I wouldn't put it past her to take my phone away.

"Darling, please, I was here for work anyway, I have a very special patient I needed to look over so It is no worry coming to see my boy, plus I gave Gail a ride over and she made you those cookies you like so much."

This catches my attention, I feel like a kid again, my favourite cookies, dam, I need to get stabbed more often,, well, no, not stabbed, maybe just charm Mrs Jones a little bit to get some of her coveted homemade cookies.

"Really, what the triple chocolate hazelnut swirl ones?"

Mom nods and pulls a box from her bag.

"See, so don't worry about me Christian, I honestly had work to do before my shift."

"Wait, so I'm not the 'special patient mom'?" I mumble with my mouth already full with the delicious offering.

"tut, Christian, please, don't eat with your mouthful, despite me ignoring you and your brother turning the air blue yesterday I will not be forgiving any more bad manners!"

I smirk, I knew this reprieve wouldn't last long, oh well, it was good while it lasted.

" and no, you are not my special patient,, actually, I met Taylor's God daughter and well, they were having a hard time getting anyone near her to treat without a sedative, poor thing is extremely traumatised,, and all that sedation will not be good for her, so I offered as I was covering someone's rounds and I was able to keep her calm enough to touch,, I mean treat her."

Touch,,, that was a slip she didn't intend for me to hear, but I did, loud and clear, It wasn't me she was afraid of in the elevator,, she thought I was going to touch her, she,, she's like, me, my mouth feels dry and I can't taste anymore.

I finish my cookie while looking her right in the eye, she knows what is going on in my head,,

"Mom,, does she,,"

"Christian, I can not and will not discuss a patience's medical condition or expose anything private, so please do not ask me anything of that manner, just please make sure that Taylor gets her the right help, she will need it,, and I will be coming by to treat her occasionally if that is ok with you? I have been the only one so far she has felt comfortable with and I really have no problem helping the poor girl."

That's all I have to know,, she is like me, she can't bare anyone to touch her, and just like all those years ago Grace is the only one that can get through,, she's an angel, my mom, an angel.

I am even more grateful for her in this moment, not because she chose me as her son, not because she cleaned the shit and grim of my four year old self, or because she gave me a life worth living because I am not worthy of that, any of that but Anastasia is, and if it's all I have to give at the moment, then I will forever be grateful for her because of that.

I feel a foreign lump in my throat, I try to swallow past it but its still there, softly I say,

"Of course mom, you can come and see Anastasia any time, anything she needs ok? If I can help in any way just let me know."

"Thank you darling, I am sure it will take her quite a bit of time to get over this so she will need a lot of help, a lot of kindness to heal,, however I did find out one thing she truly loves,"

My ears prick up and I slowly sip from my glass of water,, waiting, whatever it is I can get it, no matter what price, she's a girl, what do girls love, my brain flicks through all the phases and passions of my self absorbed but typical teenage sister Mia,, a horse,, backstage passes to some crappy self important band,, shoes, wait, shopping YES, shopping, unlimited access to my black Amex, of course, that is Mia's first, foremost and ultimate passion.

I got it, YES, I am feeling pretty fucking pleased with myself right now.

I try to not smile like I am the winning contestant of a generic game show, it's hard but I mask the little tell with another sip of water.

"Yes, what would that me mother?"

"Books"

WTF? is she for real, I don't think I've ever seen Mia read a book, magazines, yes, books, no, what 17 yr old likes, fuck scratch that, I mean loves books?

"Books" I repeat back to my mother, and my face must reveal my inner monologue as she simply bursts into a deep laugh.

"Oh, Christian, yes books, oh your face,,, my dear boy,"

She tries to catch her breath and I am still confused, is this a joke? Did Leila kill my sense of humour when she stabbed me? I mean, books?

"Mother, seriously, Books?" I raise one eyebrow, still not quite believing her.

"Yes, well, she didn't say much, but she was eyeing my copy of L'Assommoir during her treatment and I offered it to her to read, and it calmed her down considerably I must say." she says almost peacefully.

"L' Assommior? in French? she actually read it mom? sure she wasn't being polite?"

"No dear, in fact she said it was one of her favourites, she is clearly a very bright girl and I was thinking, while she recovers she would love your library, I mean all those first Editions and all, it would be such a wonderful safe place to have for herself for a little while, don't you think so?"

Well I seriously was not expecting that, I mean Books? this 17 yr old waif of a girl loves books, not only that but she reads French novels and actually enjoys them, don't get me wrong, I have read every book I have been given,, apart from the 'sex for dummies' Elliot got me for my birthday last year,, _prick, _but I've never really got any long lasting enjoyment out of reading, it was just a means to an end, to gain knowledge, a tool to attain power, actually, I can't remember the last book I read, after reading reams of paper riddled with stats and figures written in the smallest fucking font size my managerial team could imagine up, sitting down at home to read someone else's make believe is not my idea of relaxation or fun, ' _No you just like to tie up, blindfold, whip, beat and fuck little brown haired girls,' _

I am brought out of my musings when my mother calls to me,

"Christian, don't you think she would enjoy that? she's so quiet you really wouldn't notice her, Christian, what do you think? hmm?"

"Err, sorry, yes, I mean of course she can help herself to any book, I am glad the library will be finally of some use." '_so long as it's between the hours of Monday to Thursday, maybe I can get make a little library up in the staff area, I mean, how much can one small girl read?'_

"Oh wonderful!" mother claps her hands together as she stands to go, " Ana will love that, thank you, I will let her know next time I see her, I am sure it will lift her spirits a little, Ok, well I won't pop in on you tonight son as you really do need to rest and don't think for one second that you are doing any more work from that phone of yours, I have told Taylor to keep an eye on your usage of that thing until you are discharged, so, Turn. It. Off."

She slits her eyes at me whilst I take it out from under my cover and turn it off, only when I wave it around for her to see its off does she smile and give me a peck on the head, "Its for your own good Christian" she says tapping my shoulder lightly as she goes to leave.

"Yes mother, thank you for the visit and for passing on the cookies, I will let you know when I am discharged, goodnight."

After she's gone I am left alone, just as I wanted, but now with the darkness creeping through the sky outside of my window reminding me of the inevitable restless night of sleep I find myself hoping Mother comes back to tell me more about the intriguing Miss Steel.

After brushing my teeth and changing I shift uncomfortably back into bed, before I know it my eyes feel like lead and I feel myself drifting off, flashes of a girl smiling and long auburn hair flying in the wind, violet eyes shining with hope lulling me into a peaceful state.

A.P.O.V

_"I told you I would find you Anastasia,, did you not believe me, did you think I would give up? how could I let you leave me huh? just when you're almost ripe for the picking._

_Look at you, trembling with anticipation,, you are just begging for it, aren't you hmm?_

_"NO!, Please,, d,d,don't touch me"_

_he grabs me at the crown of my hair and jerks my head up so I have nowhere to look outside of his eyes, so dark, like black pools of putrid tar, he's so close to me I can see the dirt imbedded into his pores, he smells like death, metallic and rotten._

_I try to escape the terror crashing over me again, closing my eyes shut hard._

_I know I won't make it this time,, he made me watch each time before, its the fear in my eyes that he gets off on, I won't die giving him what he wants, he won't get that part of me again._

_" .ME!" _

_He shakes my head at my refusal, and screams at me to open my eyes over and over, with each denial I can feel the belt across my body, its feral, not controlled like before, he's desperate but I won't open my eyes, I won't give in._

_"If you won't look at me Anastasia I will make it so no man will ever want to look at you."_

_I can't feel him on me, I can't hear the swoosh and crack of the belt, I guess his hands are sore from beating me, I can feel my body shaking, I know he's not gone, I can still smell him, then I hear it, a match! He's going to burn the house down, with me inside,, oh god, please no!, I curl myself up and pull furiously and desperately on the cuffs latched around my numb wrists but like the 50 times before it's no use, sobbing into my chest I hear him next to me, breathing out the smoke that's suddenly clouding my face, I cower away even more and then his hands are on me, in between my legs, he violently tugs my panties down so hard the fabric burns against my skin._

_"THIS, this" he says close to my ear as I feel his fingers cup in between my legs_

_" was supposed to be mine Anastasia, you're whore of a mother was just a means to an end Ana, you, it was you that I wanted, but you knew that, didn't you,, you liked knowing that I wanted you, I can tell, but now, now you won't give me what I want, what I waited for, so long I waited for this, for you, but you had to ruin it, ruin us, so now, I will ruin you, break you, no one will want you now Anastasia."_

_I can hear his words, they fill my head like rank polluted water seeping into my brain._

_He grabs my thighs, with his vice like grip and forces them open, he pulls my body out of the coil I was twisted in, I am flat, open wide and everything is sore, I am stretched unnaturally against the cold kitchen floor._

_I try to kick my legs, but he sits on them, he's too heavy and one leg won't move anymore, my body betrays me and I can't fight anymore._

_I still as I finally accept this is it, I will let him do whatever it is, I have no breath left, no fight, I am slipping further into my head as I feel him rub my thighs over and over._

_I can hear the noises coming from me, whimpering and sobbing as I realise I will never feel anything but this again, he whispers to me,_

_"Ready Anastasia?"_

_"n,n,nooo"_

_the blinding white hot, searing pain shocks through me, adrenalin shoots like electricity up my body into my brain, I can't comprehend this sensation, my body on instinct, seemingly without any conscious effort tries to save itself and jerks like a fish pulled from water, the sounds I can hear are mine, but I am not making them, they just come out, uncontrolled and raw, I feel it again, my bladder lets go and the warmth pools around underneath me, embarrassment is over ridden quickly by the now un relentless agony killing my soul._

_It comes again, and again, until I forget to breath, my body so consumed with assessing this torture that It forgets its first instinct, I feel the coolness of death approaching wash over me, it feels like peace and acceptance, this I can take, I feel my mouth twitch into a small smile as I give in to the darkness, soon I will be gone, soon I won't feel, I won't wake up, and right in this moment I want it, I want to disappear so it won't hurt anymore, my lungs burn as I refuse them air longer and longer, the darkness is coming closer, coating me in its finality, its quiet and calm._

_My body is floating, I don't feel the weight of my flesh, or movement across me, for the longest time I am left to be, I just am._

_I can sense someone close, its the warmth of a body, it comes to me, close and hesitating, a hand rests on my forehead, and lips close to my ear, I can smell them, so clean and reassuring, he, he smells like home, like outside in my back yard, and something else, his smell invades my nose, cancelling out the foul stench from before, his hand soft but firm, pushing the hair from my face, oh so gently, like a breeze._

_I can't hear him, just the tone, deep and steady, then "shhhhhh" fills my ears as I start to breath again, shallow, but steady, the warmth spreads across me, when it reaches my toes my body goes limp and I know I am safe, safe with this man, so safe I can fall asleep like before this all began._

**So, there you go a little insight as to what happened to Ana, next chapter will see the moving in day! update in the next 48hrs :)**


	7. New Home New Hopes

**Hey, so, here is the next chapter, I hope you all enjoy! I welcome all criticism.**

**I wanted to clarify that last chapter in A.P.O.V she was dreaming, I will also clarify that she was groped in between her legs, however she was not raped. The pain she felt was from being burned with cigarettes, these injuries are mentioned in previous chapters, but I just wanted to make sure that people didn't get upset coming to the wrong conclusion.**

**Thank you again, I have another family Birthday on Friday, so Update will be Saturday!**

A.P.O.V

I wake from my nightmare,, dream, what would I call it, it was horrific reliving that day again, but at the end, just before I woke up I felt a peace that has evaded me for the longest time, in fact I am not sure I have ever had that level of intense serenity in my life before, who was he, what did he do that melted all the fear away?

I refuse to let my brain deal with this right now, I can't stop the images from before popping up without a prompt into my head as it is, so I need to shut it down, I need to protect myself.

I calm my breathing down and pull at the PJ top to loosen the fabric twisted from sleep around my neck, its still dark outside despite the clock telling me its nearly 8am, its February and I can see a slight frost on the trees and roof tops that are within my view, some of it glistens slightly when a few rays of the first morning sun shines through the bleak coating of cloud,, normally I would find that beautiful and gaze with wonderment at how such a simple product of nature could simultaneously be almost ethereal and in other situations almost deadly, one wrong ice patch on the road and a whole family could be wiped out, but now, now I just look, I see it but I don't hold it to any question, it is what it is, just like I am what I am,, broken, shattered like someone took a sledge hammer to a perfectly frozen lake, splintered into distorted angles a seething mess of filtering emotions that move through me as swiftly as he destroyed my life and took my daddy away.

"Daddy," It comes out so softly I wondered if I actually made the sound, would he be able to hear me call him? no, he can't hear me anymore, never again will I hear a reply to that word. I can't pity myself, I lead that monster right to my daddies front step.

I should have stayed and meted out whatever punishment was betrothed upon me, after all, I am the daughter of a whore, who could blame him for thinking I would not fall far from the tree, I was chosen to be his, if I had just fell into line my daddy would be here, I wouldn't be with him, but I could still hear his voice over the phone,, I could still send him those easy meal for one recipes and I could still laugh hysterically when he would email me the finished product, even if it was inedible, I could still have had those things, those treasured moments, now,,, now I have nothing.

I curl up and turn away from the window shunning the start of the day, there is nothing outside of that window that I deserve, nothing that can help me put my pieces back, it would be of no use trying anyway, he took little sections of me, absorbed fragments from me that I can't have back.

He brutally splayed me open like a butchers pig on the block, peering into my soul and when he couldn't have it, he destroyed it like diseased meat chucked into the furnace.

I am a carcass, a fleshed out shell of Ana, its only a matter of time before the outside starts to rot, only so long before someone looks through me and pulls me back into the abyss of filth that's tainted me for so long.

It's a waiting game, I just hope I don't end up hurting anyone else in my periphery.

T.P.O.V

Today is the day I have to co-ordinate the Boss and Annie's discharge and get them back to Escala, Thankfully with the extra staff it shouldn't be too much trouble.

Annie's room is all set up and Dr. Grey has arranged for a nurse to come in the morning to help with Annie's medical needs, although I am not sure how that's going to pan out with her not being able to touch her, but time will tell.

I am waiting outside Annie's room with a breakfast Gail made watching her scowl at the window, she still has a vacancy in her eyes as she turns her back on it.

I open the door and she shifts to look in my direction but still not able to lift her eyes to mine and I bring the tray round to her bed and set the breakfast down.

"Hey Annie, Gail thought you could do with a nice hot start to the day, you know the doctors said you can come home with me today."

she sits up and wrings her hands in her lap, head down, but no tears right now, which I am thankful for.

"O,Okay,, th,th,,thankk, y,, you."

"I've got to sort out Mr. Grey's release as well Baby girl so I will see you soon ok?"

She nods at me as she nibbles at the toast as I get up to go.

I wish I could hold her, or just a quick cuddle but I won't, she seems to be doing better the further people stay away from her so I leave her to eat and make my way up to see the boss.

I hope he isn't too pissed about the other day, I guess I will have to let him know about the touching issue, not that it should be a problem, he is just the same.

As I reach the elevator I see the familiar sight of a shockingly white blonde bob, the doors close on me, fucking Elena Lincoln, what the hell is she doing here for fucks sake! I don't need any more shit to deal with right now and that woman shit stirs and causes trouble wherever she sets her stilettos.

I decide to grab a coffee and catch up with Gail while the she devil does her worst.

I can't even fake niceties with that insipid bitch and I am just about hanging on emotionally right now as it is, I don't need to lose my job by telling her to take a running jump from a platform edge.

C.P.O.V

" Arrghh! Fucking socks", how the mother fucking fuck am I going to get these on, I refuse, simply refuse to have someone help me put socks on like a god damn toddler.

_'push through the pain Christian' _ I repeat over and over in my head stretching out and bending my knee up as gently as possible, I am actually sweating with frustration.

Leila is fucking lucky I can't get my hands her right now, fucking crazy Cunt.

Just as I am hooking my sock over the ball of my left foot I lose my balance and as I roll to the end of my bed my sock pings off and lands at the feet of Elena who has just walked into the room.

What the hell does she want, I can't risk mom seeing her here, I feel my face contort into a scowl.

"Elena, what are you doing here? I am being discharged today so I haven't got time right now,"

She makes her self comfortable in the chair opposite me with that ever present smirk.

"Having trouble are we darling? you know I could help if you can't do it yourself"

I hate asking for help, but I have been at this for 20 fruitless fucking minuets and to be frank I just want to leave this hospital asap, besides Elena has seen me in much more embarrassing situations than this _like the time she fucked my ass with her stiletto as punishment for keeping a girls number in my phone,_

"Erm, actually yes, if you don't mind, my stitches are starting to bother me, thank you."

I pass her my other sock after she retrieves the other from the floor, she takes it and strokes her fingernail down my hand as she removes it, puffing her chest out and jutting her chin up, she's in Domme mode, WTF is she doing?

"Thank you what, Christian?"

Has she had a fucking stroke, I think to myself, eyeing her oddly, her breathing is shallow, and as she lowers her face to mine I can see her eyes dilated with arousal, is she truly fucking mad, she's getting the horn on in my hospital room, the hospital in which my mother, HER best friend works at, that's not even accounting for the fact that we haven't shared a scene in over 2 yrs now.

I raise my eyebrows at her, " Thank you Elena. " Her shit doesn't work on me any more, in fact I find her comical on some levels, however she still deserves my respect so I won't rub her face in how ridiculous she looks right now.

She edges closer to me and I keep my face as passive as possible but I am getting tired of this bullshit.

she runs her hand through my hair softly and then harshly tugs at the back,

" Thank you what, Pet?"

PET! I am no longer her 'pet' and haven't been for sometime, I can't believe she said that!

I try my hardest to reign in my temper but the room temperature reflects my inner fury and as she see's the iciness set in my eyes she gulps and tries to recover herself with a fake smile and a cackle when I don't return the gesture.

"Oh Christian, darling, please have you lost your sense of humour whilst staying here? You know I am only playing, here let me help."

She gets on to the floor and swiftly puts my socks on, skimming my ankle her touch makes my skin crawl slightly.

She stands up swiftly and click clack's on her knee high leather heels over to the sink to wash her hands.

"Thank you, but you still didn't answer my question, why are you here Elena."

"Well, I was obviously worried about you Christian, I mean, Stabbed for goodness sake! I hope someone's head is going to roll for that Christian, your security should have prevented something like this easily, Grace said it was an ex employee, but how on earth were they able to get that close to you, in your own office no less!"

Now I feel a bit bad, she's my only friend, the only person who knows the real me, and however much she comes across as a grade A bitch she really does only care for my wellbeing, I feel my resolve slipping slightly whilst I watch her pace the room.

"Elena, I am fine, honestly, the person has been dealt with and I should be physically back to normal in a week or so, all I need you to do is find a decent sub, however keep her on stand by, I won't be ready for the playroom until the end of the month, but please make sure they are going to be discreet, and no more fucking lunatics."

"Well, I already have a few candidates lined up, but I will be testing them out myself to make sure we get the right one for you Darling, but really Christian, I don't know why you're not spitting feathers over this attack, Who are those other security outside, ones built like a wall and where the hell is Taylor, I thought he was the head of your security, he needs to be taken down a peg of two if you ask me, letting you end up in the hospital,,, "

I cut her off abruptly, "Elena! That's enough! Taylor has had a lot on his plate the last few weeks and he needed time off, those are the replacement security and they are doing a fine job, it was an unforeseen incident that happened at my office, they were disguised as a maintenance worker and used the trades entrance, which is monitored by GEH staff and the situation has been resolved Ok, so enough about this, Taylor practically saved my life by getting me here as quickly as he did."

I sigh as I stand, a gesture to let her know I've said all I am going to say, but Elena wouldn't be Elena if she didn't try to weasel more information, I know her and Taylor don't get on, but I don't need them at each other's throats right now.

She moves to block the door and folds her arms across her chest, head cocked and a quizzical look upon her half frozen face.

"What do you mean, he's had a lot on his plate! YOU are his plate, you pay his wages Christian, you should be at the top of his list of priorities, maybe he isn't up to the job if he can't focus on what he is being paid to do, what possibly could be more important than you? hmm?"

I can tell she isn't giving up, and she will probably end up meeting Anastasia at some point, even in the elevator, but some part of me deep down wants to keep Anastasia away from her, not that she would hurt her, but Anastasia is pure and innocent, and well even though Elena helped me immensely there is no doubt she is as fucked up as me and knowing she is Taylor's God daughter will not endear her to Anastasia in the slightest.

"Taylor has had to take on a family member temporarily, his God daughter was left orphaned recently and they haven't been well, so he has been split in his duties for a while, however they are staying within the staff quarters while they get better until something else more permanent becomes suitable. "

Trust me Elena, Taylor's priorities are entirely appropriate at the moment so let this go please, thank you for the visit, now you'd better get going before my mother comes by before I am discharged."

"Yes, of course darling, please forgive me, its just that this whole situation did make me worry, I am your only friend Christian, I will always look out for you.

I will email you details of the candidates I have selected for you, let me know when you are free to meet ok."

She's still cocking her head at me and has her arm crossed and her left hand tucked under her chin, stroking her neck, she is curious.

I tried to sound flippant, as if I am not remotely invested in the situation, but I think Elena senses my trepidation and reluctance to discuss it, however she leaves mollified with the details, she's quiet, too quiet for her, but I am too anxious to leave to think it over right now.

"Yes, and again, thank you Elena, goodbye."

After the door softly clicks shut I text mom to let her know I need to leave, but she texts me back letting me know that she has already given Taylor my discharge papers when she bumped into him in the Hospital restaurant.

Good he should be here soon, I take a leak and as I flush I hear Taylor knock and enter.

Man he looks like shit, rough, beaten down exhausted shit.

"Sir, we are all ready to get going, we have secured the back exit and no press have been alerted to you staying here, which is in itself a mini miracle so I am pressed to get you out of here in the next 10 minuets Sir."

"Yes, I couldn't agree more, I am beginning to get cabin fever, I feel like a fucking tourist attraction every time the student nurses start morning rounds, Umm, Taylor, look I just wanted to apologise about the other day, with Anastasia, I really didn't think and to be honest, it was stupid of me to make any move towards her, is she going to be ok?"

I can feel the anxiety build within me, muscles flexing underneath my skin trying to gage Taylor's face is usually fucking impossible, but with the lack of sleep and I am guessing the severe stress makes his face crumble slightly with my last question, clearly she is not ok, and I get a feeling he's not sure how long its going to take or even if that is an eventuality for Anastasia, poor bastard.

"Well, it wasn't you Sir, its with nearly everyone, she can't,,, I mean, she doesn't like to be touched anymore, the only person she hasn't freaked out on is your mother, I believe she has already talked to you about treating Annie periodically at Escala."

I nod at him, understanding him completely, but he continues.

"Annie actually wanted to make sure you knew she was sorry about her reaction, she was very upset with herself, I told her you would understand sir, actually there are a few things you should probably know about Annie if she is going to be living with me you may see her time to time."

"Ok Taylor, go ahead, but please I understand her,,, issues, more than I wish I did, she has nothing to be sorry for."

"Thank you Sir, well the thing is Annie has always been very quiet, very easy going,

Unfortunately since the attack she can't look at anyone in the eye, so please don't take this as rudeness, she has also developed a stutter which we are to ignore, her Dr said it was very important to allow her to go at her own pace, so even though I doubt you will be conversing much, if you do, please go easy on her. I can't have her relapsing, she has been through too much already.

As Taylor speaks I feel a dull ache in my chest, I can hear his pain and for the first time in forever I can empathise, I feel for the Guy, he is a hard mother fucker, but hearing his voice crackle in desperation sits heavily inside of me.

"Taylor you have nothing to worry about, if this was my sister I would do everything you are doing, I won't cause trouble, she sounds very mature for her age and again, if there is anything you or she needs let me know ok, right now can we please get the fuck out of here!"

I needed to break this sombre atmosphere, I don't need to start hallucinating about beaten up brown haired girls again, especially not in the presence of Taylor, he can almost read my fucking mind so no, gotta shut this down, all hope of that evaporates when Taylor pipes up that Anastasia is being discharged today and will be riding with us.

_SHIT! _what if she freaks out again in the car, maybe I shouldn't look at her, _keep your hands to yourself Christian, sit on your god damn hands!_ I tell myself, I can't see her cry again, not like before, if I had a heart it would break to see that again.

Taylor opens the door and I slide in, carefully, so fucking carefully like I am sitting next to an IED.

I don't look directly at her, but I can see she has curled her feet up onto the seat, no shoes, her toes curling and uncurling as she hugs her knees, head of matted hair twisted towards the tinted window.

In the reflection I can see her eyes closed shut, her face twisted as if in pain.

when we start to drive I can hear her humming a beautiful tune, so sweet and pure like something a child would sing, I look at her in wonder and suddenly realise She's hiding from me, I make her uncomfortable, I am such a fucking asshole I should have ridden in a different car.

I just want to make her smile.

We are back at Escala, Taylor is getting Anastasias wheelchair ready whilst Sawyer and Ryan take all of her and my medical equipment and suitcases up in the service elevator.

I get out and see Gail speed walk through the garage, she looks so excited but she's trying to hide it. I can guarantee its because Anastasia is here, Hell, I don't even know her and even I am looking forward to having her around, nervous, yes, but still its something new, someone different.

As I close the door I hear Gail yelp and see her limping off a grate she stood on, she leans against the nearest car and keeps her left foot off the ground, looking around for Taylor.

Just then he appears with Anastasia curled up in her wheelchair, head down and again hugging her knees, she is so small, so frail looking, I just want to hold her and keep her safe, I am not used to fighting my instincts and I start to feel restless.

I wish she knew I wouldn't hurt her but I know how hard it is to trust when someone destroys your faith.

Taylor stops at my side and Gail calls out,

"Jason, I need some help, I can't weight bare on it at all, I am so stupid I didn't even see it! "

"Ok, well I will have to help you up into the lift ok?"

He looks over at me and asks me to wheel Anastasia up the ramp and to the elevator.

Holy Fuck, last time I was in an elevator with her I gave her a panic attack, I don't want to scare her, what the hell can I do, I can already see her body curling into itself tighter, recoiling from me, She needs to know I won't, I can't hurt her.

I nod over to Taylor and start to manoeuvre the wheelchair and I hear her whimper when we hit a small pothole.

Shit! I don't know what made me do what I did next but it just came out of me.

I stop and crouch down in front of her, looking at her, hesitating for a moment not quite sure of myself.

"Annie," Thats what Taylor calls her, obviously she prefers it, so I will stick with that.

" Annie, Hi, my name is Christian, I am not going to touch you, I promise I won't ok, I don't like to be touched either, you don't have to tell me what's wrong, but I get it.

I am sorry for before, I just wanted to meet you properly."

I am so fucking scared, I feel like I am waiting for a bomb to drop.

But then she moves, her head slowly lifts up, and I get the quickest flash of her eyes on mine, it makes me smile, even though her eyes flick down just as quick I am banking that look in my head, it was so childlike, innocent intrigue, perfect.

"Y,y,,you, your,, l,l,lii,,llliike,,,, m,m,m,meee.

She gets it, so fucking sweet, that little stutter, I want to crush her to me and tell her it will be ok, I want to make her smile, but right now, this moment, its the best result I could ask for,, she knows a little piece of me,, she can start to trust me.

Letting her know I am the same strangely enough doesn't make me feel weak, which is how I always envisioned I would feel, I don't know what emotion is coursing through me right now, apart from satisfaction I will have to speak to Flynn about this, It will make a nice change from discussing pimps, crack whore mothers and Elena.

I smile again, in fact no, this is the same smile, I can't drop it.

"Yes Annie, I am the same, just my chest and back though, so please know I won't hurt you ok, I promise you are safe here."

She sobs, with what I think is relief, " Th,th, thaaannk, y,y,yo,you."

I get a little close, but not crossing the boundary and whisper " shhhhhhhh,"into her ear, " its ok, you're safe here Annie."

She nods at me and we head towards the Elevator, with me grinning, I know I am because my jaw aches using muscles I haven't needed for most of my life.

Taylor is waiting by the doors, staring me out, I can see his Jaw tense and he looks a little unhappy.

Shit I think I just pissed off a brand new Papa Bear!


	8. Sweet Dreams

A.P.O.V

_" Annie, Hi, my name is Christian, I am not going to touch you, I promise I won't ok, I don't like to be touched either, you don't have to tell me what's wrong, but I get it._

_I am sorry for before, I just wanted to meet you properly."_

I can feel the sincerity in his voice, its true, he's broken, just like me.

I feel the warmth from his body invading my own, its soothing and I almost will him to come just a little closer so I can feel it everywhere but all my body allows is a quick look to see the truth in his eyes, there it is, so brief but his eyes reflect back my own damage.

His eyes, so gray, like polished marble, tiny flecks of golden bronze making them shine at me, intense and alluring. I want to look for longer, find out all of his secrets hidden just beneath but I can't,, not yet.

I can hear the smile in his voice as he continues to talk to me, its the first voice that just for a fleeting moment makes me forget the last 3 weeks, its brief but so welcome I feel a wave of relief wash over me, so overwhelming, I never thought I would encounter that emotion again.

I tuck my head back into myself and as if he read my mind he edges on the precipice of my personal space and whispers a calming " Shhhhhhh" into my ear, telling my I am safe and I believe him.

As I take a deep breath to calm my body I smell him, its, its home, I can smell home. I can smell the stream that runs through the woodlands behind my house, the dusky Autumn air after picking the last of the apples and Blackberries from my small fruit trees, fresh and earthy. Its mixed with the smell of a man, him, just him, my nose can't tell what the fragrance is, its just Christian,, it warms me, I crave a deeper breath of it, it settles me deep inside and all the tension within my body slowly melts, I am sore, stiff from holding myself together.

As we enter the elevator I suddenly feel the air around us cool, I can feel a tension in the air, not sure where it's coming from I just keep my head down and push the unease out of my mind and suddenly the elevator comes to a stop.

I peek out from behind my knees and see the most beautiful display of flowers on a deep rich mahogany table just before some large doors made of the same wood.

Uncle T sets Gail down by the table and opens both doors leading to a wide hall, white walls filled with a multitude of rich coloured Madonna with child paintings, each one conveying tenderness and sadness at the same time, each emotive amplified by the quantity of paintings adorning each surface.

It seems poignant, almost an unintentional statement from the man I am about to live with, I'm not sure what it means, but I feel my intrigue grow a little more.

As I am wheeled through I feel the warmth ebb from me, suddenly I see Christian move forward away from me as Uncle T takes over and pushes me towards a set of plain doors and I turn to see where Christian is going but I just get a glance of his tense back turning a corner.

For a second I feel deflated, _of course why on earth would he want you living here, you're just a broken fucked up kid, you are here because you have no where else to go, its pity, pity is what he looked at you with downstairs, just keep out of his way and don't screw things up for Uncle T and Gail._

Inwardly I sigh, I know I am right, its just that I felt like things were going to be ok when he spoke to me,, that I wasn't totally alone. I guess it's better this way, I don't want to drag anyone else into my tainted life if I can help it.

Before I know it I am parked at a long table, I look around and Uncle T is setting Gail into the opposite chair, checking her over as she winces whenever he manipulates her ankle.

He says its not broken and goes to get her an ankle support and some Advil.

I can feel Gail's eyes on me and I wish I could look at her, but I feel so full of shame, I know what I must look like, I haven't washed properly for weeks and my skin feels dry and looks grey, _like a rotting corpse_ I can't even touch my own hair, I can still feel his hands tugging and ripping at me there.

I close my eyes, trying to rid the sensation creeping all over me when Gail pipes up.

" Annie, we've made your room up sweetie, we managed to get a few things over from your house, all your books are set up, I bought you some toiletries that I thought you might like, but you just let me know if you need anything else or something different and I will get it for you.,,, I am so relieved you are finally here with us though Annie, I know its not a happy situation, but we are here for you, always please remember that, nothing you say or do is wrong here, you're family Annie."

Her voice cracks towards the end and I feel the love pouring out from her, I've only met her twice before but she won my heart over the first time we met, we prepared and cooked for a my daddy's annual veteran reunion, we were the only women there and although daddies fellow service men were like a weird bunch of macho uncles and cousins it was so nurturing having her with me all day, I found myself wondering why my mother couldn't have been made more like Gail, there isn't a bad bone or mean molecule in her body,, in many ways she reminds me of Dr. Grace, both strong but sweet.

"I, I've mmmmisssedd,,, y,y,yoooou G,Ga, Gaail" I say on the cusp of a sob, her words strike me deeply, every word true, I know they want me here, I know they will do anything for me, I just don't feel deserving of this level of care, it settles uncomfortably in my stomach.

"Oh, sweetie," she says in a rush hopping up around the table as quickly as my tears start to fall into my lap.

"Oh, no Annie, don't cry, I've,, I mean, We've missed you so, so much, please, I know it's overwhelming but just do what you need to ok, anything, I won't touch you sweetie, but I need you to know that I wish I could hold you and give you a squeeze right now!"

This makes me choke out a quick and loud laugh that I wasn't expecting, she's so honest, its refreshing. I wish I could, I don't know why I can't right now but its just pain radiates through me when it happens and my body can't take anymore.

Gail leans over the table, and sighs in relief, " Oh that's a much better sound, one you should be making more often from now on sweetie, I'll take a laugh over a hug for now."

She blows me a kiss as Uncle T sits her back down.

"My girls laughing together already, well that's the best sound I've heard in weeks"

I smile at him, but not with my eyes, he's taken such good care of me, the love for my Uncle T over comes me and I will myself with everything I have, I feel shaky and so vulnerable, I don't want him to see what happened in my face but I want to show him my gratitude so I take a deep breath,, hold,, shut my eyes hard and place my eyes upwards to where I think he is and,,, OPEN,,

T.P.O.V

I can hear her take a deep breath, I panic slightly and fiddle with the ankle support to keep my fingers busy while I steal a quick apprehensive look at Annie, when I reach her face I can see her big baby blues staring at me and if the love pouring out of her eyes doesn't knock the air out of my lungs then the steady but deep " Thankkk, y, you" sure as hell does.

When she lets the breath go her eyes shut back down and she is trembling from effort.

I take a second for myself and just marvel at how strong she is, so wilful and bursting with love, she did that for me, I needed it, I needed to know she was going to be ok and now, well, now I know we can take the next steps whenever she's ready, with my firecracker Annie I have a strong feeling we will all help to get her there, but she will be the QB in this game and I couldn't be more proud.

"BABY GIRL! You, You looked at me Annie!" the tears in my eyes trickle down as I blink back in amazement at my girl, my throat is tight and I know my face is flush I can feel the heat from ear to ear I so fucking stoked.

She nods at me, smiling and crying just like me, she looks dog tired so I take her to her room and she looks all over, not saying anything until she sees the blanket she made Ray on her bed and trails her fingers softly over it as if it were precious silks.

She picks it up and brings it to her face, I hear a deep intake of air and I can't take my eyes off her, wondering if this will tip her over the edge today into another panic attack.

She quickly pulls it away from her face and breaths out " Its b,b,been washed"

I don't know what to say, but I guess Gail would have done so,

" Yes Gail just ran it through, it was a bit dusty, is, is that ok?"

"Hmmmm," She takes another deep breath of the blanket and folds it up into a hug.

"It,s ,s,smells,,li,,like,, h, home"

"I will let you get settled in Annie ok, just press 3 on the phone if you need anything and it will come through to me, Gail will bring you some dinner a bit later, there are some cereal bars and juice boxes in the draw to your right, sleep well Annie."

She nods at me, still lost in her blanket as she manages to hop and boost herself into the bed, looking like she's already fallen asleep by the time I get to her door.

Well thank fuck for that, I breath out not realising I was holding onto one and smile to myself, now I just have to figure out what to say to the boss, I don't know what they were talking about in the garage but I can't believe the smile he had on his face, what the fuck was that about? It hasn't escaped my eyes that Annie looks just like a younger version of his Subs and with her living so close I don't want him getting any ideas.

Annie is mine to protect now, she's vulnerable as hell and I know every other women in Washington state drop their panties when he lays on the charm but I won't let anyone boss or not get anywhere near her again,, damn I thought with Sophie being 8 I would be dealing with this situation a lot further down the line.

Before I get to leave our digs Gail calls out for me so I back track and by the look on her face I can see she has something of her own to say.

"Jason Taylor, I know you were not just about to go and put your foot in it with Mr Grey now were you?"

_Fuck! I can't get anything past this one, I am still not convinced she isn't ex CIA or something._

" hmm, What makes you say that baby? Just going to have a friendly word, make sure we understand each other. Don't worry about me ok"

"I know you Jason Taylor and I saw what you saw downstairs but you're wrong! I've never seen him smile like that before, it wasn't a romantic smile, they were sharing a connection and don't you dare ruin this for them, they both needed it, didn't you see Annie relax and she looked at him? He makes her feel safe."

"She what?! she looked at him?"

"Yes, and after they talked her whole body relaxed, didn't you see that? she seemed a lot calmer than before."

"Why on earth would he make her feel safe, she doesn't even know him! I've been there every day at the hospital and she only managed to look at me today, why didn't she open up to me Gail, I just want to help her, she's, she's mine to look after now, I'd do anything for her!"

She looks at me with a sad small smile and sighs at me..

" Jason, she knows that, she loves you just as much, she wouldn't have pushed herself today if that wasn't true but they share something, the same pain and that's a connection you can't deny, plus I've never seen Mr Grey care about someone as directly as that before, she's almost like a little sister to him, he just wants to help her, like you do, like we all do, so don't shut him down please, he, he needs to help her, he needs to have someone in his life to look after for a bit, maybe she will be good for him too, make him see that he's not as awful as he thinks he is?

This, this right here is why I love Gail Jones, she can see so objectively and does it so beautifully its hard not to see her as perfect.

I know deep down my feelings are hurt, she's opened up to the boss more in the last few hours than me in the last 3 weeks, it stings but Gail is right, they do share something and if it helps Annie then I won't stop it for now.

"Yes, I guess you are right there, I mean its just I want to keep her safe and he's so messed up I don't know if he's the right one to help, I tell you what Gail, he better sleep with one fucking eye open, if he fucks this up I'll shoot him with the same gun I protect him with."

She scoffs at me and laughs, " I wouldn't expect anything less baby, now go clear the air with him because even I got chills in the elevator on the way up here, your demeanour didn't go unnoticed I can assure you."

"Ok, I guess you're right, as always, Oh, by the way, did you wash Annie's blanket?"

"Yes, actually I put it in with Mr Grey's wash by mistake, thank goodness he doesn't wear any colours otherwise it would have ruined the wash! Why, did it upset her?"

_Perfect, fucking perfect! God damn Fucking Grey, he better be up to the fucking task because he will bite fucking lead otherwise._

"Umm, no actually she went to sleep with it wrapped all around her, she said it smelt like home."

I am not impressed, but what the fuck am I supposed to do, it got her to sleep.

Gail chuckles at my dead pan expression and chirps " You can't fight this Jason, just go with it, I love you." I can still hear her chuckling as I leave our apartment.

C.P.O.V

I am sitting here in the library looking over all the furniture, thinking how to arrange it best for Anastasia, I remember when I was younger, whenever I was in a room I always had to sit in a far corner facing the door, it was safer that way, I could see every angle of the room, see who was walking through the door, it was based on pure survival instinct, a reaction no 6 yr old should be aware of really but I know that Anastasia will be feeling defensive and vulnerable for sometime to come and I want this to be her safe place, so I start moving the couches and love seats to the far corner, opposite the L shaped wall of books,,

"Damn, fuck this is heavy, ughh,, Move! christ, just,, fuck,,ing,, move,,"

I try to reposition myself and grab under the couch trying to pivot it across the room maybe, hell I don't even know what the fuck I'm doing but I just want it done.

All of a sudden I hear Taylor's harsh voice chiding me as he rushes over,

"What are you doing, STOP, for Christ's sake Grey you're still recovering, Jesus!"

"Taylor,,, I'm fine" I grind out as lifting one end starts to aggravate my wound.

" Yeah, you really look peachy right now, fuck, just move."

He pushes me gently to move and as I stand back up straight too quickly I feel like I've been kicked in my side, shit that stings like a bitch.

"What the hell are you trying to do anyway, you can get people to do this,,, whatever it is you are trying to do."

He looks at me perplexed, I don't think he's ever seen me lift a finger in the house, not to clean, put a dish away or even to sweep up the numerous cups and glasses that end up smashed against the study wall.

"Well, I was just trying to move stuff around to make it easier for Anastasia."

Shit, he's staring at me again, he is not a happy camper, fuck, what have I done wrong now!

He's leaving me hanging and for the first time ever I am actually nervous of Taylor so I start rambling, looking at my feet, scratching at my neck like I'm some fucking 14 yr old talking to my dad.

"Well, you know, I mean, I know, well no, my mother told me that she, sorry, Anastasia likes books, she likes reading, that's what she meant and she sort of suggested, well thought it would be a good idea to you know let Anastasia have a sort of safe place, so she mentioned that it would be nice, well good for her to have the library as her place, I MEAN, no, I mean a place where she could feel safe, I was just trying to make the furniture look more cosy, well safe, so she can you know, see the door and everything, I was going to get some more lamps and blankets and stuff, you know whatever girls like, that kind of stuff,,,,"

I didn't realise I was holding my breath until I let it out, _what the fuck dickwad, why are you tripping over your own damn feet like a fucking juvenile! ._

I look up to see the look on Taylor's face has softened, but he's still eyeing me curiously and then it clicks into place, _Fuck! he thinks I like Anastasia, he thinks I want in her panties, wtf, is he sick she's just a kid! she's so small and fragile, I can't believe he would think this,, why?_

I've got to get this under control, make sure there is no misunderstanding whatsoever.

"You know, actually I have no idea what a teenage girl would prefer in here Taylor, maybe I should ask my little sister to bring some things over, what do you think?"

_BINGO!_

He sighs slightly and rubs his eyes with his right forefinger and thumb, he's finding this as uncomfortable as I am right now, good!

" Well, actually Annie isn't really like Mia at all, she's low maintenance all the way, so I think we can just change the layout like you said and she will be more than happy, she won't see past the books in here anyway so tell me how you wanted it and I'll get Sawyer up here to help."

The relief I feel at that is overwhelming, thank god he gets it, I don't want to have that kind of conversation with him, it would cross a line that we both acknowledge is beneficial to both of us.

"I do have to say though sir that Annie has really opened up to you today, you're the first person she has looked at since she was hospitalised, she trusts you."

What is he saying, I don't know what's going on inside of me but I feel a smile forming and I can't stop it, she's ok with me, she trusts me.

I can't think of what to say right now, I frown looking at him while trying to get something coherent out but it doesn't come.

"I have to tell you sir that Annie is basically my daughter now, she's mine to protect and I won't let anyone hurt her again, no matter who they may be, so I am reminding you, trusting you to tread carefully with her. I don't like it, but if you are of comfort to her then I won't stop something that can help her recover am I clear."

I suddenly feel the heavy responsibility weighing on my shoulders, normally this would evoke stress from me but I find myself welcoming it, I need to accept this and do whatever I can for this girl, its important to me and I am confused as to why that is but I won't fight it, I don't think I could if I tried.

" Crystal clear Taylor, I don't know why but I feel very protective of Anastasia, I promise my intensions are just to help and see her recover, I have no doubt she is an amazing person and I hate to see someone so broken, let me help in anyway I will do anything I can to see her get better."

He nods at me, and I know he understands, he gets that I was just like Anastasia, he can see the sincerity in my eyes as I implore him to accept it and he does.

I leave him to organise the Library with Sawyer and finally get into the shower to wash all the hospital off me.

As I'm showering I relay over everything that happened today, I can't believe Taylor thought I was interested in Anastasia, I mean she's what, 17 yrs old, although she looks much younger, sure she has dark hair and even tear stained you can tell she's pretty but she's just a year older than Mia, she's so broken I couldn't see her in that way ever, she's so petite it pains me to know she hasn't been eating properly. I close my eyes as I duck my head underneath the shower head and rest my forearms on the tile wall and I see her tiny body, thin and birdlike, I vow to myself that I will get her to eat, the pain I feel when I think of her wasting away causes me to groan out in frustration.

As I dry myself off I look at the scar on my lower abdomen, two small red raised lines that make my knees feel week when I graze my fingers over them.

_This is what you get you sick fuck, this is what you have to show for your twisted lifestyle, you got away easily, remember how you used Lelia, how you fucked her ass and made her body sweat with exhaustion through each position? She was just a little girl once, just like her._

Shit! I grab onto the sink and shake my head trying to rid my mind of that little epiphany.

What the fuck am I doing, how did my mind travel that far, I've never had a problem with what I do, they know what they're getting into, if they break the rules they get the punishment, they sign the contract knowing full well what they are going into.

No I won't feel bad about this, not after that bitch stabbed me, fuck it.

I get myself dressed and by the time I'm finished I have rationalised to myself that there are girls like Leila and the other subs who live for the lifestyle, that's what they are for and girls like Mia and Anastasia, well they are too innocent for stuff like this, even when they grow up, they are girls that deserve hearts and flowers, romance, someone who will treat them like the queens they are.

They are nothing alike and never will be.

I shake of the unease that's flooding my head, I don't like where my mind is going with this train of thought, I need to live this way, its part of who I am and I won't stop just because of one hiccup.

As I am leaving my closet I spy some folded up Laundry sitting on the dresser and start to go through it, I pull out a T-Shirt that is most definitely not mine, firstly its olive green, way too small, its worn out with some small holes around the arms and neck, I lift it up and I see in small black stitching "A. R. Steel" It looks like a mock army shirt until I turn it around and see 'MARINE' emblazoned across the back in worn out transfer.

I smile knowing how much she must love this shirt, she's clearly worn it a lot, her father was a marine, no doubt he bought this for her, I can't believe how small it is, I hold it up against me and its so ridiculous I laugh out loud.

Knowing she will be missing it at some point I head over to the staff quarters, when I open the door I can't see or hear anyone. I pad through the hall way, kitchen and living area, I go to leave the shirt on the sofa but as I turn a sliver of light catches my eyes so I walk quietly over to the door and push it gently, as soon as I turn the light off out of habit I hear a garbled "Nooooo" I know that sound, its the sound of being caught in hell and not being able to find your way out.

I hesitate to take another step but the scream that pierces through me fills my soul with an urgency to act, my legs carry me through the room and I burst through the bedroom door, the scene playing out in front of me chills me to the bone, its Anastasia, but the grimace etched on her tiny face makes her look like some kind of tortured angel, writhing in pain, her hair wild and sticking to her sweaty forehead like a dark halo.

I can't bare the horrific sounds coming from her tiny frame, she screeches out once more " Ssstooop, Pleease sttoop,, Nooooooo,, One, ughh, Two, arghhh, THREE! "

She whimpers out another moan and the sounds suddenly sound familiar to me, she's counting out a beating, fuck I feel like shit.

I can't listen to this anymore and I kneel down at her side calling her name "Annie, Annie, wake up Annie, its ok, come on baby, '_baby, where did that come from?'_ shhhhhhhhh, Annie, you're ok you're safe here baby _'again Grey wtf?!'_ shhhhhhh"

She stops thrashing about and curls up into a ball on her side facing me, her breathing slowing but still ragged, my body is tense, I can still see the pain on her face, I go to move the hair off her cheek without thinking and as I softly stroke the lock away she turns her cheek to my hand and breaths deep, as she exhales her eyes half open, glassy with unshed tears,, for a moment I think she's going to flip, my fingers still between her cheek and ear I could almost punch myself in the face for breaking my promise.

As I go to withdraw my hand she suddenly looks panicked, her eyes widen and she whispers softly, " Christian,, no,, please." she stops my hand with her own and presses her hand on top of mine and keeps is against her warm face.

All I can do is whisper back "Ok Annie" which makes her sigh with relief,, she closes her eyes as I shuffle closer on my knees, suddenly I feel exhausted and lay my head on the edge of her bed, before I drift off I think I hear her mumble sleepily " hmmm, Chris,,tian,,, safe." I feel my body relax at her words and even though I'm half on the floor, half on the bed, in the most awkward position I have never felt so comfortable as I finally fall asleep next to her.

Thank you for all the reviews I really love reading them, even the not so nice ones, all constructive criticism as they say so please continue to let me know what you think.


	9. To the rescue

**WOW, thank you all again for the reviews, I love reading them, here is a little tease of a chapter, just a little bit more for you to salivate over!**

C.P.O.V

_"Chris,tian, where are you,, come out come out wherever you are,," she sing songs at me, I can hear her foot steps creaking on the floorboards, she's getting closer,,, _

_"I can hear you breathing Christian" she whispers loudly across the room, "It's just you and me now, everyone has gone, it's safe" her whispers are softer now, reassuring and I trust the words she speaks._

_"I think I'm getting close, closer,,, closer,," I can see the shadow of her legs from under the gap of the cupboard I'm hiding in, I can smell her, its like apples, crisp delicious apples, apples and berries, like apple blackberry pie._

_My mouth waters thinking about food, I'm so, so hungry and right on que my tummy rumbles, with that the doors to my hiding place, my safe place are ripped open, I jump with the sudden whoosh of cool air and all I can see is bright blinding light, it's warm, welcoming, I blink wildly trying to gain a sense of what's going on when I feel someone picking me up so gently, embracing me, I've never felt such a gentle touch before, my body accepts soaks up this feeling, its so healing, my limbs start to tingle with heat and I rest my head on her shoulder while she rocks me,, "Mommy," I say as I press my face into the crook of her neck and wrap my scrawny 4 yr old arms around her neck._

_"No Christian, look, it's me, I've got you now, shhhhhhhhh"_

_My body tenses at the realisation this isn't my mother, the crack whore still didn't save me, not even in my dreams,, I turn towards her face and see violet blue eyes peering into me, telling me I'm ok, they are shining with happiness, hope, and something else I don't recognise, her hair like golden brown silks billowing around her radiant face._

_She see's me, all of me, all of what is to come, my darkness and as my face falls she leans her forehead against my own small one and tells me, " Christian, it's ok, I know, I know, but to me, you're just Christian, you won't hurt me, you can't, it will be ok, we have each other now, we will be ok, see"_

_With those last words I get raised above her and we spin around and around, when I look down at her she's smiling so brightly it's contagious and not a moment sooner do I start smiling back, laughing, "see Christian," she says as I reach out to touch her face something jerks me,,, what, no, I want to stay,,_

G.P.O.V

"Oh my goodness, look at that."

I've come to wake Annie up for dinner, she should be hungry by now and she's had a good 2 hour nap but when I walked into her room I never thought in my wildest dreams this is what I would find.

With my hands clasped together pressed against my chest and a small smile on my lips I edge closer to them.

Who would have thought I would ever find the 'great Christian Grey' in such a position? I chuckle inwardly at how Annie already has him wrapped around her little finger, here he is on his knees, leaning over the side of her bed, head tucked under her chin and she has his hand sandwiched between her face and a hand of her own, with her other resting in his mane of unruly copper locks, but it's their faces that reveal the truth of the situation,, peace, they have both found peace with each other, there is a pureness to this scene and I almost want to take a picture, its rare to witness the intensity of such a connection, he doesn't know it yet but Annie is going to be a game changer for Mr. Grey and I can't wait to see him discover who he really is little by little, who he has been all along.

I see Annie shift slightly and I look at my watch, Oh no, Jason will be home with her prescriptions soon I need to break up this little slumber party before it's too late, stitch on a button I can do, patch up bullet wounds not so much!

"Mr Grey,, Mr. Grey" I say whilst gently nudging his elbow.

He's stirs and peaks a look up at me with that little lost boy look he rarely gets and my heart melts just a little for him.

"Come on, up you get, Taylor will be back any minuet and you need to get moving."

Whoa! that got him up! he almost knocks me over and I have to really try hard to keep the bubbling chuckle inside me from passing my lips.

He's still half asleep bless him but I can see how shocked he is, running his hands through his hair he turns to me,

"Sorry Mrs Jones, I didn't mean to fall asleep, Annie was having a nightmare and well she wanted me to stay,,,, I'll get going."

"Don't worry Mr Grey, its fine, I am just glad she had someone with her, now dinner will be in about 20 minuets ok, go on now, be quick before Taylor gets back."

He sprints over to the door before I can finish my sentence before turning and looking over at Annie again,, he hesitates to say something and scrubs his hand over his face,

"Take care of her Gail, please."

I see a small glimmer of wonder pass over him, just as quickly it's gone and he turns to me, mercurial as ever, " I'll have dinner in the library today Mrs Jones, thank you."

"Of course sir," and with a nod he's gone.

C.P.O.V

As I make my way over to the Library I try to get back to my equilibrium, that dream was so vivid, so real, she saved me.

I look over the room and its exactly what I wanted it to turn out like, a trio of couches and love seats arranged against the glass wall over looking Seattle in a small 3/4 square opposite the books, a coffee table in the middle and the floor lamps positioned in between each couch so she can read at night.

I stretch myself over the longest one, cross my legs and put my hands behind my head, I still feel exhausted , I've never felt at ease and peaceful as I did in Anastasias room, when she spoke to me so clearly with that look of need in her eyes I couldn't tare myself away from her, no one has needed me like that before, I felt like I had a purpose, serving something grater than my own gratification,, I want her to need me.

As I take a deep breath I feel her hand in my hair, so soft and warm, my body relaxes at the memory of it and I allow myself to drift off, just for a little while, maybe I can dream of her again before dinner.

Suddenly I jerk awake, I see it's dark outside and a quick glance at the wall clock tells me I've been asleep for about an hour.

I go to sit up but the pain from my side reduces me to rolling off the couch and getting up off the floor.

Something's not right, I see my dinner plated at the desk, as I go to take it to reheat I hear that sound again, "Help, No!" the highest pitch causing the hairs on my neck to stand up, without thinking my body carries me swiftly to where the sound is coming from, I run into the staff quarters, looking for any sign of danger, I see Mrs Jones fumbling with a large set of varying keys, tears falling as her hands don't go as quickly as she wills them to.

She tries one and another, still not the one she needs, all the while we can both hear Anastasia screeching out, pleading and begging,,

"Who's in there Gail, who's in there with Annie?"

She jumps at the sound of my deep angry voice, I can't stop it, I am almost in Dom mode with rage.

Her face loses all colour at the sight of me and more tears fall, " Sir," she gulps heavily, " there's a nurse in with her, but She told me she would sedate her before treating her, I don't know why the doors locked, I can't get it, please sir, I can't find the key."

I wave my hand at her to move and she complies immediately, she pushes herself into the corner and I swiftly take my foot to the door, I feel nothing, just a desperate need to get to the other side.

As I pound on the door, splintering it almost in half I hear Anastasia sob out to me, "CHRIS,TIAN,, HEELLP, MMEEE,, HEELLP,,, MM,MMEEE!"

"FUCK! ANNIE,,, HANG ON ANNIE!"

I can't help but roar back, I need to sooth her, _I'm coming baby, I've got you, hang on, come one Grey hurry the fuck up!'_

With one last heel kick the door comes away from the hinges and I boom out at the figure trying to hold down a distressed thrashing Annie, "YOU! OUT, NOW!"

I see the nurse jump away from Annie as if she's been struck by lightning.

I rush over to Anastasia who surprises me by reaching out both hands to me, without thinking I bend down and scoop her up, one arm under her legs and one around her back, _god she's weightless' _I press her hard against my chest and,, nothing, no pain, just warmth, that warm tingle but no pain. I hardly have time to think about this though, but I quickly look down and see her face pressed against me, hand tight around my neck. _she's so small, don't break her Grey._

The nurse clears her throat, _I thought I told her to fuck off!_

She straightens herself out and takes a step forward but falters on the next step as my anger at her results in a low animal like growl.

"Sir, this is for her own good, she needs to be treated, she is at risk of infection, she won't talk to me and she won't take the medicine, I was just trying to restrain her as carefully as I could, but she was putting up a fight, she actually ripped my tabard, look see!"

She gestures to a piece of fabric flapping loose but I couldn't care less,

"How DARE you, you fucking incompetent waste of space, have you even read notes on your patient? She has Haphephobia, you can't touch her, and why on earth do you think it's appropriate to lock her door? This is HER home, this is HER door, if she didn't ask you to lock it YOU DON'T FUCKING LOCK IT! Get out now or I won't be held responsible for my actions. GET OUT!"

Before she can leave, my body removes Anastasia from her presence and we end up in her bathroom, I slide down the door and hold her trembling body close, tucked into me, I try to breath out the adrenaline that's still coursing through me.

I can feel my heart beating rapidly, like I've run a marathon, I need to calm down before I lose it, as I fight to keep the rage from bubbling over I feel Anastasia's hand rub the back of neck, soft circles from the base up into the nape where my hair starts, round and round, _hmmmm, that feels good, don't stop_ and she doesn't, she pulls at me to rest my head on her shoulder and its as if she has me hypnotized, I fall to her and start to rub her back gently, she gasps softly in my ear as I feel her body stiffen slightly at my movements so I stop, after a beat she breaths out " Christian,, it doesn't hurt with you"

I can't believe it, all my senses leave me and I crush her to me with a low chuckle, " I know baby, you don't hurt me either."

I pull her hand down from around my neck placing it right over where my heart should be and I stroke my thumb over her knuckles _damn this feels so right_ I press a chaste kiss on her forehead and whisper " not even a little."


	10. Bath Time Baby

**Thank you again for all of the reviews I really do appreciate them! Story picks up a bit quicker after the next chapter so I hope you enjoy this one and look forward for the next.**

C.P.O.V

We sit here wrapped up in each other, both of us trying to shield the other from painful memories, revelling in the small touches passing between us, I can't get enough,, I want to hold her, always, my skin feels alive for the first time under her hands, just as I take another deep breath of her to savour she looks up at me, eyes burning with questions, all of a sudden I feel nervous.

"Christian,,"

"Yes, Annie."

" How long, how long ago were you, hurt?"

My stomach twists at the knowledge of what I am about to disclose about my sordid beginnings, but I can't lie to her, my tongue won't allow it.

"A long time ago Annie,,, My Mother, was a crack whore,,"

I feel her press harder into me, telling me with her body she's sorry, protecting me from my own words, truths I already know.

"Her, pimp didn't like the fact I was there,, I guess I put her customers off,,, so he used to beat me,, and eventually he used me as his personal astray."

I hear her whimper and feel her face twist into pain against my neck, her hands tighten around me, its almost painful but not quiet.

"Where?" Is all she manages to get out, and without thinking I gently unravel her arms from around my neck, scrambling off me she sits at my feet, legs tucked under her chin, hands wrapped around herself, ankles crossed, eyes waiting,,,

I look at her, tears welling up for me, willing me to open myself up, she takes my hand and kisses the palm softly before pressing it upon her cheek where my thumb absentmindedly wipes the tears that fall,,

"See Christian, its ok," She speaks the words from my dreams, it galvanizes me into action,, I need her to see, I don't want to hide from her, I can't.

I reach behind and grab at my T-Shirt to pull it over my head, as it comes off my head slumps forward, I don't want to see the pity in her eyes,

I keep my eyes closed, it feels like time has stood still, all I can hear is both of our ragged breaths echoing in my ears.

" Say something " my voice is hoarse and deep, desperate even, desperate to hear the words from my dreams.

I hear her stand up, I open my eyes, I see her shadow before me but still I keep my eyes on her feet, she's shaking, all her toes curled up against the cold tile.

Slowly I see her PJ bottoms slide down around her ankles as she gingerly steps out of them.

My eyes grow wide, _wtf is she doing, god no, Annie, put them back on!"_

"Look at me Christian, look at me and see"

I shake my head, _NO! _forcing my eyes to remain on the floor. _What the fuck have you started Grey, she's 17 and she's stripping down in front of you, Taylor's going to fuck you up! Keep your eyes on the fucking ground asshole!_

She starts to sob and I feel like a fucking dick, I promised I wouldn't hurt her and here I am making her cry, but it's for her own good.

"Annie, please,,"

She takes a step back, " No Christian, I need you to see, see what he .me, please Christian, I need to know if it's true."

_What he did to her? you arrogant prick, she's not coming on to you, Jesus! she's showing you her own damage, LOOK AT HER GREY!_

At her words my head shoots up to her face, I'm not sure if I want to look any further down, but when I see her eyes shut closed like mine were just moments ago I know I have to do this for her.

My eyes slowly travel down her trembling body, she's tensed and I can see a thin sheen of sweat coating her pale, slender neck, her arms dead straight at her sides, hands fisted, knuckles white, my eyes drift to her core and suddenly my eyes notice a contrast in colour just below, they dart down and my breath hitches in recognition to the marks on her thighs, pale creamy soft skin marred with deep red round wounds, six on her right and 2 on her left.

I can see the hate poured into each burn, he pushed hard, I can see where her flesh has concaved, the skin surrounding them is red raw, it looks not far from being infected, but no one can touch her, _you can touch her Grey, she trusts you, you can fix her_

The urge I have to protect her, undo the damage, make her smile spurs me into action, suddenly I don't feel broken, my focus is no longer on me, its 100% on her.

I realise I'm still staring at her legs, I jump up to see her eyes still shut, tears flowing quietly from underneath, her face all scrunched up.

She must feel the warmth of me close to her, she relaxes and lets out a steady long breath.

Her big baby blues snap open and shoot straight to mine, her tears start to slow and I wipe the last remaining droplets with my thumbs as I cup her face in my hands._ she's so bloody cute, her eyes are way to big for her face, she's like a baby deer, lanky and skittish, innocent and unaware,. how could anyone want to hurt her? _

"Will I be ok Christian, can I be fixed?" She breathes out shakily, those blue orbs pleading against mine to say yes.

I tilt her face up to mine and peer right back into her, " Yes Annie, you'll be ok, we will fix you up again, but first we need to wash those ok?"

She holds a breath and nods at me, trying to reassure her I press my lips against her forehead and start to run her a bath.

I pull her onto my lap as I test the water and add some of her medicated bath wash creating large clouds of soapy foam to form.

She steps away and walks to the nearest wall opposite me, all I can see is her back, even this far away I can detect all of her vertebrae protruding through her clothing.

_She needs to eat, fuck! there's nothing to her, I need to get food in her._

Hesitating with the hem of her shirt, for a second I think she's become shy in front of me. I furrow my brow and go to reach for her, before I can get to her she swiftly rips of her top like its a band aide, her arms quickly wrap themselves around her torso.

Stripes, red raised brutal stripes cover my Annie's back, I can't move,, my body feels like its drowning in mud, flashes of my own hand lashing some random subs ass with my own collection of belts play through my mind, even at my angriest I've never left marks like this, I feel sick, my mouth is flooded with the warning of tangy bitter saliva, _If you throw up Grey she'll think she makes you sick, she'll see herself as a monster, push it the fuck down NOW._

Unbelievably my body refuses to force out the vomit threatening to make an appearance, every part of my being collaborating to make sure I don't hurt Annie.

"Can you fix this too?" her voice is growing smaller each time she speaks to me, but she's clear, no faltering in her words to me, she still trusts me.

I walk over and stand behind her, she's shivering, rubbing my hands up and down her arms I place a small kiss on her shoulder, " Yes Annie, we can fix all of this, come on, lets get you cleaned up."

I lead her over to the bath and check that the cast on her leg is made of fibreglass, she suddenly looks nervous as her eyes dart to and fro from each of mine,, " W, Will you wash my hair?"

"Only if you want me to Annie." and by god do I mean that, my mind can't even comprehend causing harm to this precious girl, ever.

I see her accept my words, she wants to believe me and I think she does, but there's more pain rising up, her throat stiffens as she struggles to tell me.

"He, hurt me Christian, he wouldn't let go,,, I can still feel him pulling"

She looks right at me with those eyes, taking a deep breath she bites down on her bottom lip, _damn that's cute, _She's asking me to be gentle, she's trusting me completely with her emotional safety and it makes my pride swell.

I make a silent vow to make sure that sick fucking cunt remains in a room that smells of his own shit for the rest of his days.

"I promise,"

"Pinkie promise?" She interrupts me holding up her left pinkie finger

I chuckle at her innocence and hook my pinkie finger around hers,

"I Christian Grey, pinkie promise, you Anastasia Rose Steel to forever more treat your locks with reverence and the upmost care that they deserve, as if they were fine threads of spun gold, Ma'am!" as I finish with a exaggerated bow I hear the most beautiful giggle tinkle out of Annie's crescent shaped lips, _bank that sound grey, its a sonnet for your soul._

"Thank you kind sir" she says almost gleefully as she curtsies back.

In a bid to keep the jovial atmosphere I continue, whilst holding her hand to take a step into the bath, " Come on me Lady, thine bath awaits."

She settles down into the water, still in her plain black cotton underwear, _it's just like a bikini, a really simple bikini, like if we were at the beach, you don't want her like that Grey, but hurry this up, Taylor will kill you and make it look like an accident._

But one look at her, finally relaxed, her head lolling against the back on the bath and all my self preservation dissipates into the corner of my mind. This is the most peaceful I've seen her, she needs this, so I will just have to deal with the consequences. _you're a glutton for punishment Grey, he's gonna knock you the fuck out!_

As I sit here and watch Annie's face slowly soften with each second she's submerged I think back to how Grace used to approach bath time with me as a child, even though she couldn't touch me she would direct me, step by step, she would talk me through any action she made before it happened so as to not startle me, she gave me the illusion on being in control.

_Get back on track Grey, she needs to clean up those legs,_

I sigh to myself, forcing my thoughts back to functional, I open the bottle of medicated bath wash and offer it to Annie who has her eyes firmly locked on mine.

She flinches at my offering and sinks further down into the water until just her nose and upper face are showing.

I raise my eye brows at her while I lay down a little challenge, trying to provoke her into taking care of herself a bit, " If you're not going to do it Annie, I'll have to"

She silently nods at me with pleading eyes, "Please" she rasps out from just above the water line. _Well that fucking backfired on you didn't it jackass!_

The longer I contemplate, the sadder her eyes become,_ will you ever be able to say no to her you Pussy!_

"Ok Annie," I sigh in happy defeat.

I start to lather up the gel in my hands as the wash cloth will be too harsh on such sore skin.

Annie has raised her legs, both feet resting against the wall behind the waterfall taps, leaning back on her elbows, bracing herself for the onslaught of pain.

"Annie, are you ready? I'm going to be quick ok, gentle but quick. If you want me to stop, just say stop and I will so, immediately do you understand?"

"mmm,mmm" she nods at me, with that lip trapped again.

I start at her ankles, my fingers overlap my palm when I gently wrap my hand around one out of curiosity_ she's like a bird, a tiny precious bird, careful with her._

"You have big hands Christian,, but you won't hurt me"

I look up at her in wonder, _she can read your mind, who the hell is this girl? _I clear my throat, " No Annie, I couldn't hurt you, it would break me to do so"

She smiles at me, " I know, and I can't hurt you either, I won't "

This is starting to get too deep for me, the emotions whirling around my head have had me blindsided all day, I know already she's important to me, I know I need to help her but I don't want her to be beholden to me, I can't be fixed and I don't want her to try, she'll only end up disappointed.

I look away from her, not able to vocalise the ramblings of my inner voice and smooth my hands up and around her slender calves, around her cast and circle her knees.

I 'm concentrating so hard on keeping my touch gentle I don't instantly notice the soft tune she's humming, just before I get to her thighs I peek up at her and see she's clocked out, her gaze is glassy and void of emotion, her humming grows as I softly and swiftly sweep my hands over her wounds.

The sound stops and I see her ribcage still, I hate doing this to her, I can feel my nostrils flare, my breathing becoming deeper as I struggle to contain my anger at what she's gone through, how she's suffered and still is.

As my hands fall away from her she sinks down and immerses her head into the water. I push away the bubbles masking her face and her eyes pierce into mine filled with sorrow, I try to apologise with mine but she's already breaking the surface, forcing out a long shaky breath.

"Thank you Christian" she says softly, blinking away the droplets forming on her long dark eyelashes.

"It's not over yet Annie, lay back in the water and it will make it easier to wash your hair ok."

"Ok, but ple.." " Don't worry Annie, I'll be gentle ok?"

"I know,, it just,, he just hurt me really bad." she says to me whilst looking down into the water.

"Just say stop and I'll stop, same as before."

She gives me a nervous smile while I pour the shampoo into my hands.

As I start to lather up I mentally go over all of her injuries and how I can make them right,_ Broken leg, I can help with her physio, do some weight training with her, build up muscle tone, high calcium diet, improve bone density and strength, broken fingers, same as above, maybe get her a stress ball, try to build up dexterity, Piano would be good for that, Belt marks, well, I could get her some arnica cream, it works on my subs, although her back is so much more severe, the burns, well, maybe a plastic surgeon can have a look, if she wants, let mom mention that, just in passing, make sure she knows her options,, finally,, Flynn, see if he can,, _

" I'm ready Christian. "

I'm pulled out of my mental checklist by her nervous little voice.

Turning my face to hers I notice she's scooted closer to me, my eyes soak up all the finer details now clear to me, freckles, she has the cutest smattering of light freckles over the bridge of her nose, her lashes so lush and long, framing those incredible one of a kind eyes.

As my own eyes rake across her features I feel her sweet breath come faster against my face, I feel my eyes burn with intensity as a sweet pink blush rushes to her cheeks. This level of intimacy is foreign to me, she's just a girl, but I can't deny how beautiful she really is, here in this bath, its not hard to imagine her as a siren stranded on a rock, calling out to those that willingly flirt with danger.

Before I allow my thoughts to run away further from me I bring it back to task.

My voice comes out husky and deep, betraying my illusion of self control,

"Lay back Annie, again, just say stop and I will."

As she starts to lean back I suddenly remember her words from before,

_I need you to see, see what he .me, please Christian, I need to know if it's true."_

I put one hand on her upper back just before she hits the water and ask her,

" What did he tell you Annie, What do you need to know?"

My eyes dart from hers down to her neck and back again when I notice her gulp at my question.

" He told me,, no one would want me now. " Tears well up as I shhhhh her.

While I let her sink down to float I tell her with sincerity " That could never be true Annie."

Floating in the water, she's looking intently at me while I tenderly run my soaped up fingers through her locks, paying extra attention to deftly sort out the tangles I can feel.

I realise she can't hear me, her ears are logged with bath water so I whisper to her my confessions,

" How could anyone not want you Annie, look at you, so beautiful, so sweet, all the boys will want you, but they can't have you Annie, I won't let anyone hurt you again, I'll keep you safe, I'll keep the nightmares away,, what have you done to me?"

She pulls herself up as I finish talking to myself, water rolling off her dainty frame eyeing me up with curiosity,,,

"You think I'm beautiful?" she squeezes out in disbelief, wide eyed, her insecurity palpable in the air.

_Shit! she fucking heard you Grey!_

I can feel my face heat up, I've never been caught out like this before,, just as I try to find the right words I hear a pounding from behind me and the unmistakable roar of my head of security.

"OPEN THIS GOD DAMN DOOR GREY! I SWEAR TO FUCKING GOD, OPEN IT NOW!"


	11. Papa don't preach

**Thank you again for the reviews, as always I love to read them, here is a sorry little chapter for Taylor.**

A.P.O.V

As he lay's me back into the water I hear him mumble "That could never be true"

The look of pure belief on his face half convinces me to think he's being honest, so when I sink down and float with my ears rendered useless.

I focus on his face, looking for any clue as to what he's thinking ,he doesn't give much away but I start to see his lips barely move as he runs his hands gently through my matted mane.

I feel kind of guilty watching him speak, he has no idea that I can lip read, in fact only Ray knew since he encouraged it,, volunteering at the local school for the deaf and blind certainly taught me many skills, skills I wanted to use in my future career of publishing.

Now here I was in Christian's hands, basically in my underwear, yet I feel inherently safe and not shy at all trying to comprehend what he's just said.

Not really trusting myself just yet on each word since it's been a while I've had to use these skills, but there was no mistaking how hips lips mouthed out Beautiful, me beautiful, _beautiful, has he gone insane! Has he looked in a mirror lately, he's like a Greek god carved from the finest Italian marble, blessed with a gaze that can set your soul on fire and a touch that leaves tiny warm sparks of static across your skin. _still no matter how ridiculously hideous I feel, knowing how he sees me makes the scattered pieces of my self worth edge closer to each other.

Me being Me I go and let the word vomit spew forth, "You think I'm beautiful?" _God could your voice get any higher Minnie Mouse!_

Oh dear, I wasn't supposed to know that at all by the look on his face, _how can he be even cuter when flustered and beet red?_

As I look on while he flounders to find the right words I jump from the sudden loud incessant pounding coming from behind the bathroom door, for a second I think that the horrible nurse is back, but then I hear the angry words of Uncle T shouting out to Christian. _Why would he be mad at Christian, you've been helping me, I can't let anyone else touch me, you cleaned me up!_

One look at Christians face tells me there's more going on here, he's lost all his colour and for a second I think he's about to be sick.

I must look concerned because he grabs my face tenderly and tells me,

" Hey, Hey, don't worry about me, lets get you out of the tub, and one more thing Annie, "

"Yes Christian" I say whilst he wraps me up in the softest, warmest towel I've ever felt touch my skin and tucks me under his chin, rubbing my back.

"Just so you know, if I don't make it out of this alive,, you really are very beautiful"

With a kiss to my forehead he puts me at arms length and goes to put his shirt on.

Before he reaches the door I call him " Psssssssst!"

He turns round with a small frown, _does he look good with any expression for goodness sake!_

"What" he whispers with a shrug, so I flap my hand at him to come back, as he gets to me he smirks and whispers into my ear, " You fishing for more compliments Miss Steele."

At that I burst with a chuckle, shaking my head at him, " No, I just thought you'd be safer if you carried me out of here, Uncle T won't tackle you to the ground if I'm in your arms,, that way you can get a head start to escape, how fast can you run?"

His grin widens almost with pride at me, " Beautiful and a smart mouth Miss Steele, jump up then " He holds out his arms at me and I am all too willing to take my place in them, he's so playful, almost like the big protective brother I never had.

It warms my heart and for a fleeting moment I feel my age again.

We get to the door, still shaking and creaking under his relentless pounding. The ridiculousness of the situation we are in starts to manifest into the deepest belly laugh, Christian looks down at me shaking his head with the corner of his lips twitching to smile as he unlocks the door, "I'm glad you find my imminent demise so funny" his remarks just making my laughter escalate into a loud snort.

_No God damn way Steele! what the hell kinda noise just came out of you!_

I look up to Christian and see his mouth clamped shut, eyes streaming with tears and his head and shoulders bobbing, trying to control his laughter.

I slap his arm playfully in mock anger but all it does is set me off again and we both fall through the door in hysterics unable to breath evenly, wheezing together we go down as the laughter weakens Christians knees, both of us completely unaware of the 6ft5 wall of rage towering over us.

T.P.O.V

As I make my way through the apartment and into my own quarters I sense something is off, its way to quiet, I can't hear the Piano going, no hum of computers, no tell tale yelling coming from the bosses study, even more unsettling is there is no low level mumbling coming from Gail's kitchen radio which is never off.

I slowly reach round to my back and snap off my gun clip, hand steady on the holster, the feeling of dread in the pit of my gut heightens my senses and as I creep quietly against the outside living room wall I hear my Gail gently sniffling.

Still on edge but desperately wanting to comfort my woman I turn into the room and make my way over to her.

Without saying a word I pull her up into my arms and inhale the calming scent of her hair, I sit her down on my lap and tilt her chin up to meet my face.

"Hey, hush now, what's wrong? Your ankle playing you up?"

"No, I am so sorry Jason, I was supposed look after her, but, but, I, I couldn't,, couldn't get in!"

My mind buzzes with confusion and then her words slam into me like an expertly planted left hook. _ANNIE!_

I shift her off my lap and stand up, pacing the length of the sofa, " What happened Gail, where is she?!"

"She, She's in her bathroom" My body relaxes for a brief second, my feet still itching to run over to Annie's room, my brain needing the visual of her alive and here.

"The Nurse Jason, oh my goodness, that _bitch_! She locked her room, she wouldn't let us in and, and the screaming Jason, Annie just wouldn't stop and I tried to find the key, I had them all, but my hands, they wouldn't work, Jason I thought she was killing her in there, I tried to get in but, but I couldn't,,,, oh,, god,,, it was,, so,, horrible Jason."

"Did she hurt her, how did you get in, what happened to Annie Gail, why did she lock the door?"

All these questions rushing through my head spill out in a shockingly demanding tone, I don't blame Gail at all, I blame myself, but I couldn't not see Sophie, she's only 8, she wouldn't understand me not turning up, but Annie, first day home and I've already failed her, my heart grows a little heavier acknowledging this.

"No, no I don't think so, she just wouldn't stop touching her Jason, she was trying to restrain her. When I was trying to get into the room, trying the keys I mean, well Mr Grey must of heard Annie screaming, he was just suddenly there and I know I've seen him angry before Jason, but he was like a man possessed trying to get in, he broke the door down Jason, I've never seen anything like it. He's, in there now,, with Annie,, I think he's cleaning her up,, but JAS,,,"

That's all I hear as I sprint down to Annie's room, I finally see the splinters of shattered door frame scattered out everywhere, the door half hanging on its twisted hinges, it looks like a wild animal has torn itself though.

I step through the carnage and my eyes flit around Annie's room until they settle on the light spilling out from underneath her bathroom door, with my ear pressed against the it I listen out for any sounds of distress but all I can hear is mumbling and the small sounds of sloshing bath water, _he's got her in the bath, Grey has MY Annie in the bath, is he in the bath with her? has he touched her? is she, is she naked? IS HE NAKED?! _Right now my mind is whirling with questions and unfortunate visuals of Grey taking advantage of my little Annie, in this moment I am not head of security I am Uncle T, father figure, protector of Annie Steele, my hands start to move of their own accord and my balled up fists start pounding at the door, I need to see her, make sure she's ok, get her away from my pervert of a boss..

Still hammering away in desperation I briefly try the handle, demanding for it to be opened.

Through the sound of my own blood pulsing in my ears I hear laughing, a deep belly laugh that I recognise as Annie's, I freeze unsure of what to make of her laughing so freely in my state of urgency. _why the fuck is she laughing, what's going on?_

The unmistakeable click of the lock triggers my reflexes and as I yank the door open Grey and Annie fall through, her in his arms, both chuckling to the point of tears.

My mind doesn't know how to process this image, firstly I've never seen the boss laugh like this, not even close and Annie, my sweet, broken Annie, it's been months since I've seen her face so carefree and untroubled.

My face softens momentarily while I take in these two, their laughter threatens to consume me until I take note of Annie's attire, wrapped up in a towel, hair dripping wet, with _HIS_ hands grabbing at her, hooked under her bare legs, pressing her into himself, leaning over her like he's some kind of knight in shining fucking armour!

In the moment my brain fails to recognize her acceptance of his touch, or the happiness radiating from her face, all my mind can see is _HIM_ all over a half naked Annie.

Shaking with anger I take a step closer, looming over the _happy couple_.

" . . . ." I grind out with my jaw so tensed I swear I'm working some teeth loose.

A breathless Annie peers up at me, her cheeks flushed, a small smile lingering in the corners of her mouth, as she scrambles to get up she starts to placate me, " Uncle T, Christian was ju"

I hold my hand up at her, keeping my eyes on Grey the whole time.

"You need to leave Right NOW Annie, go find Gail."

Grey's eyes remain on mine, he has the decency to look half guilty _Just you wait you fucker, the moment she steps outta here your ass is mine!_ He can almost read my mind and He knows he's in for some serious fucking damage as he hangs his head.

I don't give a fucking shit that he's just out of Hospital, he's gonna be on a liquid fucking diet for the foreseeable.

I can still see Annie hesitating in my peripheral, " NOW ANNIE!" she looks over to Grey and back to me, " But Unc" My temper is wearing thin, not with Annie, but just the sheer willpower its taking to restrain myself for connecting my fists with pretty boy over here.

"I SAID NOW ANNIE"

She looks over to Grey for reassurance, his face and body language telling me he's resigned to take the beating I'm about to serve.

He flicks her a quick sorrow filled smile and tries to consol her, " its ok Annie, go find Gail."

She takes a step back at his words and for a millisecond the fight in me wanes but it doesn't stop me from taking my jacket off and rolling up my sleeves, not once taking my eyes off the target, who starts to brace himself.

I take a step closer to the focus of my slowly dissolving rage, the fact that my resolve is dissipating frustrates the shit out of me, _Ray would not hesitate dumbfuck, pull your head out of your ass and crack some rich boy bones! _ rolling my neck, thinking about how often I've wanted to land this arrogant prick on his ass, trying to find the bloodlust from my own memories I look over at him, smirking up at me like he knows where my head is at encourages my animosity. _now or never T, man up._

I raise my arms in fighting mode, ready and willing, but before I can take a swing I feel a rush of air push past me and within an instant Annie has flung herself at Grey, wrapping her arms around him like a vine, shielding him from my appending assault.

She has her head buried against his chest, _no one touches his chest, no one,_ Grey looks down at her and rests his cheek on top of her head, bringing his arms around her, rubbing small circles up and down her back, cooing at her to calm down.

She turns her face to me, still clinging to him, pleading me with her eyes,

"P, Please, d..d..don't hu..hurt.. .. pl...please"

I drop my arms in defeat at her request, a small piece of me acknowledges the wave of relief that I've been refused retribution. _he makes her happy_

I know they've both read my body language, the tense grip around each other has loosened slightly and Annie's breathing is shallow and steady, Grey still hasn't moved her from his chest, _what's going on with these two? how are they touching?_

In fact he looks down at my Annie as if she's the fucking 8th wonder of the world _Damn straight Grey._

Before I can articulate a response I suddenly feel eyes on us, as I turn around I spy Gail, hand over her mouth, tears rolling down the sides of her little fingers, trying to contain the apparent relief and happiness that Annie's ok, and probably the fact that I haven't beaten the boss into a bloody pulp.

Opposite my woman I see Dr. Grace Grey, dressed in soft off whites, her hair glowing, reflecting the side lamp light, creating a fitting halo effect.

I see her own tears flowing freely, unbidden, I follow her eye line and realise this is the first time she's probably ever seen someone touch her sons chest, _probably the first time she's seen her son act like a normal human being, first time she's seen him comfort someone in need, feel like shit now knucklefuck?_

Knowing I've almost ruined a good portion of my life and almost got myself fired because I read the situation wrong fills me with a suitable amount of unease and shame.

I look over at Annie and the Boss again, she fits with him so easily, she's not afraid, not screaming at his touch, its almost as if she's alive again when he's around, like a 17yr old girl should be.

In this moment I feel, I feel redundant, surplus to her needs, I'm not Ray, I'll never be Ray and she's opened up to Grey like they've met before, I know they share a certain experience, but, its so intense, standing here watching them my skin starts to burn, I feel embarrassed, like I don't fit in this picture.

I go to leave, I can't breath in this room anymore, I've failed her, I've caused her more pain which I promised to protect her from.

"Its ok Taylor," Is all I hear from the boss as I exit the room with Gail quietly following my sorry ass into our bedroom, feeling mentally like I've gone 12 rounds with Ali, defeated and resigned to the knowledge I am suddenly at a loss as to what my role is,,,


	12. All men are created equal

**Hi Guys, sorry about the lack of update but I've been really busy, after this chapter things get much more heated on someone's side at least! **

**I love this chapter because it speaks to my heart about a daughter and father type relationship, I never knew my father but I did have one special man in my life who treated my no less, blood doesn't make family x**

**Really love reading reviews so please keep on, thank you!**

C.P.O.V

After all the chaos settled down I left Annie to get some rest, she didn't really need anything else done so after my mother checked her over she joined me in the Great room for a drink, when I saw her crying over the situation between me and Taylor I knew she'd have questions. I didn't want to answer her, hell I didn't even know what to tell her as I was struggling myself to make sense of the last 24 hrs, all I knew is that Annie was suddenly edging closely to the most important thing in my life, no one has ever meant more to me, my feelings were jumbled and if was being honest with myself I wouldn't be able to stop being around her, I was more than willing to take a beating for being the one to bathe and take care of her.

When she turned over to fall asleep in her bed all I could see was the empty space next to her, _my side, _the urge I felt to climb in after her, pull her tiny frame to mine, let her warmth comfort my unconsciousness and drift off with the fragrance of her hair filling my senses was almost instinctual, as if my natural place in the world had always been right next to her. _what is she doing to me_?

While I'm deep in thought mother gracefully takes a seat opposite me and takes a less than ladylike gulp of her Gin and Tonic.

"Christian, its been less than 24 hours since you and Anastasia were released from the hospital and I come over to find you and Taylor in some sort of show down and, and, Anastasia, Christian she was touching you, since when has this no longer been a problem for you?"

I swill the whiskey around my mouth like a mouthwash of Dutch courage, contemplating on what I feel safe divulging to my mother.

"It still is a problem, its just Anastasia mom, only her, she doesn't hurt me, we don't feel the pain with each other,, that's why I gave her a bath mom, and Well, Taylor saw me carry Anastasia out in her towel and we had a small misunderstanding, one that will be rectified shortly.

The nurse sent from the hospital locked Anni,,, Anastasia in her room and tried unsuccessfully to restrain her against her will..." I can't help my visceral reaction at the memory of hearing Annie's desperate cries. _I need more whiskey._

"More?" My mind reading mother asks while pouring another two fingers into my glass.

"Yes, thank you" I take this one down in one go to numb the first stirrings of anger.

"You didn't hear her mom, I've never heard anything like that and I just had to get to her, my body just reacted and well that's how the door... anyway I dismissed the 'nurse' and I tried to clean Anastasia up a bit so I gave her a bath, mom, she's like me and I just needed to help her, I just, just wanted to,,, "

I sigh in frustration, unable to find the balance between what is going on in my head and what I want my mother to hear, the fact is I don't want to share the moments Annie and I have had together, those touches, those looks, those discoveries of honest emotions are mine, _ours._

I walk over to the wall of sheer glass, over looking uptown Seattle, everything clouded in grey light, fog and mist twirling together reflective of my immediate emotional and mental state.

"You wanted what Christian?" my mother speaks to me so softly, gently coaxing just like when I was a child and my anger would cause my fists to take over from my incompetent unwilling mouth.

"Mom, I don't know, I just want her safe and happy, that's all really, I just want her to be ok." _and to hold her, sleep next to her, wash her soft creamy white skin, heal her scars, kiss all eight scars, show her how beautiful she is, brush her long golden brown hair, make her laugh until she makes that ridiculously cute snort, kiss her nose, see her eat, watch her dance without care, see that light shining in her baby blues,,,, yeah seems like you want a lot more than safe and happy Grey._

Internally I frown at myself, _she's 17 _nearly 18, _arrghh shut up for fuck sake she's still a kid! draw a fucking line and don't even allow your little toe to edge close to it, you really did deserve a beating, lucky fuck._

I look to the left of me and in the glass I can see my mothers reflection smiling back at me knowingly, holding back something.

"Christian, I promise you we will all help to put Anastasia back together again, we won't fail her, she's been through too much and I can see that she trusts you, Christian, did you touch her?"

Although the tone tells me she doesn't mean that kind of touching I still feel panicked, nervous _because you want to, you want to feel all of her, you can't get enough._

"Umm, yes, I mean I picked her up and gave her a bath mom, but she had her underwear on, I just had to clean her legs up, they were so sore, that, that son of a bitch mom, he, he fucking burned her, he burned Annie!"

I don't want to fall apart but the images playing out in my head propel me to teeter on the edge of my mind, the fact that I couldn't save her, that she was at the mercy of such a sick piece of shit, unable to fight him off,,, god,, did he,, did he violate my Annie,, the thought instantly hits my stomach and mom quickly presents a small paper bin for me to wretch into.

We settle back onto the sofa, my head between my knees, bin cradled in between my calves, mother soothing me with her hand on my forearm, a safe spot she knows is ok.

" Oh, Christian, I've never seen you like this, never. I think it would be a good idea to talk to Flynn about what's been going on here,, I am happy though, happy you finally have a friend, she's a smart girl Christian, make sure you try to keep that temper of yours in check around her."

My head snaps up to my moms slightly ashamed and disgusted at what she's just suggested, " MOM, I could never, would NEVER hurt her, never."

"Oh darling I know, that's not what I mean, its just she's very vulnerable right now and even though your bark is worse than your bite its still quite unnerving hearing what goes on in your study dear."

"Yes mother, sorry, I just, I would never hurt Annie."

Getting up from beside me, patting my shoulder, " I know Christian, I saw you together."

I try to hide the guilty look that I know is creeping up my face and scrub my hands across the 2 days of course growth, settling my hand in the same spot where Annie stroked her dainty little thumb over my cheek,, I feel that warm tingle again, I can still feel her, before I linger too long in my memories I escort my mother to the elevator and thank her for showing me how to dress Annie's thighs, makes sense for me to know how as she can bare my touch, plus I am working from home for the next 2 weeks, I can be on hand for any redressing she needs.

_2 weeks with her, we can have lunch together, I can feed her, watch her eat, god that would make me so happy, we can spend all day in the library, her reading, while I look over emails and reports, _

My errant thoughts are interrupted by the unusually gruff clearing of a throat, I turn to see Taylor entering the Kitchen, suddenly I feel about 2 inches tall and fuck if I don't feel guilty as hell, I almost want him to charge me, lay into me for the slightly inappropriate line of thoughts I'm starting to entertain about Annie.

I've never felt like this before, never has a line in my life been so blurred, I need him to take the first step, how this plays out depends on Taylor's approach so I wait it out,

a whole agonising 10 minuets later I hear Taylor shuffle over to the fridge, keeping my head in between my hands I hold my breath as the clinking of glass bottles echo around me.

I sit up as he settles opposite me and slides over a beer while he necks his own.

Taking a tentative sip my nerves calm down slightly.

" You know, when I first met Annie she was 4, the tiniest god damn 4yr old I had ever seen,,, I'd seen pictures of her you know, wallet pictures Ray had while we were serving and she was a little cutie, she could write letters at 31/2 yrs old nothing long but still, when you're trapped in the arse end of Hell its the small things that keep you going. I had no one but Ray and the Guys, it has been a long time since I met anyone who was just kind, who didn't want anything from you just to be in your life.

I was in the infirmary, I was recovering from internal bleeding, got caught up in a blast, only one in my unit that survived and the only other guy in my bay was in a fucking coma, there was nothing, just empty days, if I had my gun I would have ended it all right there.

One night I woke up to this hissing sound, it was the most unnatural and disturbing noise I've ever heard, it took me a while to realise the poor cunt next to me was rattling, I could go my whole life never hearing a death rattle again and it would be too soon.

I was is this space, totally despondent, I didn't want to be there anymore, I had nothing back home and hearing that rasping, seeing it play out, well it fucked me up, I just had to leave on way or another.

The next morning I got back from physio and there were a stack of letters all wrapped up in Christmas paper tied together right on my cot.

At first I thought it was a mistake, I mean first of all it was fucking June and secondly no one ever sent me anything, I had not one fucking soul out there looking for me.

But, no I read the name and sure as hell they were all for me, I was so confused, excited like, well, like it was Christmas morning"

Taylor chuckles at the memory, finishes his beer and goes to get another, he looks back at me silently asking if I want one but I shake out a no. I've never heard anything about Taylor's past, I know how he was raised in Foster care when his mom died in his young teens but I never really cared to ask anymore about it, I find myself desperate for more information, wondering where Annie comes into this so I keep my mouth shut and wait for the rest.

" So there I was half alive, half wishing I wasn't, knowing it was only a matter of time it would end up being my own sorry ass carried out in the middle of the night to be shipped back to the US in a wooden box. Yet I couldn't help myself, I opened up each letter, one by one, the first was a drawing, a little stick figure girl with brown hair, blue eyes, holding balloons, 3 balloons,, half the page was green and half blue, stick trees and a orange sun,, it was Annie, Annie at the park, on the back she had written,

'My names Annie yous is Taylor, we can be fends'

I watch as Taylor's soft laughter dies down, he rubs his forehead and I can see him fighting the emotions these memories are bringing back up, the air is so thick I can feel them seeping into me, we both gulp trying to shake it off but it still lingers.

I have a strong feeling this evening is going to need a lot more alcohol so I retrieve the aged Whiskey in the Great room and pour out two even glasses which Taylor unexpectedly knocks back nodding with gratitude.

I sip mine, desperate to remember each detail he relays back to me.

" The rest were similar, all a drawing, some with a stick me and Ray added, the last one is what really changed things, I mean I was touched that this little bit of a girl wanted to be friends, she wanted to see me, meet me, wanted me to take her to the park, beach, teach her to fish, ride a bike, that would have been enough for me to push myself, keep going you know, that was enough, I wanted to meet her, I never had anyone to take care of for a long time, that was enough.

The last one, the last one broke a little piece of me, I knew as soon as I saw it, read it that I would do anything for her, "

With that he downs another glass and takes out a folded piece of yellowed paper and slides it over to me with his forefinger.

" Open it" he says softly, as if it was the holy grail laying in front of me.

I gently unfold it, the paper is soft with age and I can smell the wax crayon coming off the paper, I lay it out and see a small stick Annie and I smile at it, just knowing her small hands made this fill me with warmth.

On either side of Annie are two army stick men, one with light hair, Taylor I presume and one dark haired _Ray_.

They're standing outside of a big red house, flowers in the windows and a white picket fence circling it all, so innocent, sweet and loving, she's always been like this, she's always been good.

I trace my fingers over the drawing, taking in each detail, committing it to memory like anything else to do with her.

I remember what Taylor said about the letter on the back of each drawing so I turn the paper and read,

'_Unckl T keep daddy save + me keep yous save, love miss Annie r taylor steele'_

I can't help the tears that fill my eyes, I'm overwhelmed by Annie's love and kindness, I realise now where Taylor is coming from, she won him over almost 15 yrs ago, he's loved her all this time, she saved him, she was his reason for living for a long time, this is more than obligation to Taylor, she really is part of him and I know I've been overstepping, right now I feel like a right shithead, I've been taking his role away, it isn't my place to take over, I need to step back even if it hurts and fuck even thinking about that hurts but I have to do it.

"That's the day I feel in love with Annie, and I've loved her ever since. I will never forgive myself for letting her leave with her mother and that piece of shit all those years ago, but I want to help her now, I will do anything to protect her Grey.

I am not going to lie to you, it fucking stings to know that I can't comfort my baby girl and you can.

For all intense purposes Annie is basically my first born and if anyone hurts her on my watch they won't wake up the next day.

Saying that, I know that you to share a certain history, she's comfortable with you and I need Annie happy and healthy. If you can help her in anyway then I will live with it, but if I catch you in a locked room with her half naked again I won't hesitate to finish what I was getting ready to do earlier.

WOW, what the fuck can I say to that, _nothing dumb fuck, don't give him ANY reason to pull out his glock for fuck sake!_

I'm sitting here trying to ignore the intensity of Taylor's stare, I can't hide from this man, he has been reading my mind, anticipating my needs for the last 2 1/2 years so I know I can't lie.

" She sure is something isn't she,,, I can't even tell you Taylor what she makes me feel, I guess I see a lot of what I want in life in Annie, she's special, pure and everything that I'm not. I won't hurt her Taylor, I could never hurt her but I don't think I can stay away, there's something about her that has anchored to me.

I promise I won't cross the line, I will care for her, I do, but I won't cross the line Taylor."

All the cards are on the table, laid out for both of us to digest, its clear Taylor is fighting his instinct to knock me on my ass and I can't say I blame him, he knows me, how twisted my life has been, but right in this moment I can't picture using that room anymore, I can't see myself with another random woman, All I see is her, everything in my immediate future is consumed with thoughts of Annie, all I need right now is Annie.

"You best come and say goodnight to Annie then Grey, after she told me about what happened she made me promise that."

My insides flutter and swirl, my eyes wide with gratitude and shock, he's going to trust me with her.

" Something tells me she's hard to so no to Taylor,"

He chuckles as he stands, cracking his neck, he looks exhausted, mentally and physically exhausted, " You have no Idea Grey, come on don't keep the little lady waiting, she's had a rough day."

As I follow Taylor into the staff quarters my steps feel light as if I'm walking on air, every step closer to her increases that fluttering, I can almost feel that tingle across my cheek, the last place she touched me.

We stop outside of Annie's room, not quite sure of what I'm going to do or say, all I know is I want to be right next to her,, I almost ask for permission but realise how ridiculous this is, I'm not going to hurt her, I'm not going to cross the line so I just nod to Taylor " I'll keep the door open, don't worry Taylor."

His face is portraying indifference right now, but it doesn't stop his eyes burning with what looks like hurt and a wariness, " Thank you for what you did today Grey, I wasn't here to keep her safe, thank you."

"No problem Taylor, I told you, I can't hurt her, I won't let anyone else either."

This seems to satisfy him slightly and he walks off into his own room leaving me at her door.

I walk carefully across her living area, there's no more wood splintered everywhere, it doesn't even look like anything happened here only a few hours ago.

I gently knock on Annie's bedroom door, when I open it my eyes immediately find her and my body reacts simultaneously, my skin tingles, breathing feels harder, saliva pools in my mouth and there's an ache in my chest, like she's harpooned me, pulling me to her closer until I can see her chest rising slowly with each breath.

I don't want to wake her I am still and silent, just revelling in here innocent beauty.

An involuntary sigh passes my lips causing her eyes to flutter slowly open, without missing a beat she beams up at me with a sleepy smile which in turn causes my own lips to curl up and grin back at her.

Before I can say a word she shifts back and schooches her head to the edge of the pillow and pulls back her sheets welcoming me to sleep next to her, I can feel her warmth, her sweet scent overcomes me and without hesitation I lay down beside her, face to face I can't help but stare at her face as she slowly drifts off in front of me.

Just before I feel the pull of sleep I feel her hand find mine, when I absentmindedly rub my thumb over her knuckles she sighs out my name, contentedly we both relax into each other and fall into a deep slumber both knowing this is where we belong, right next to each other, _hand in hand._


	13. Movie Night

**Hey Guys! Can't believe I've left it so long, but this chapter was difficult for me to balance but I finally feel happy with it.**

**I've also been distracted by all of the awesome stories that have been popping up, some really good starts and I love reading them.**

**Please review, I love comments, whether negative or positive I take it all on board, so enjoy!**

C.P.O.V

It has been 3 days since Annie had taken residence at Escala, the morning after I fell asleep next to her I woke to find myself wrapped around her soft warm body.

For hours I listened to her melodic breathing, every now and then she would sigh out my name, knowing she was dreaming of me filled me with emotions I've never felt before.

Without thinking I pressed myself against her, just wanting to close any gap between us, my need for her was growing faster with each moment.

Unexpectedly her body responded as she slowly circled her hips, the moment her ass rubbed right along my groin I felt myself harden, god I've never been so hard, it was almost painful.

The alpha in me flexed his hips _Go on Grey make her feel as good as you do right now, just a little taste,_ he relished the contact for a second before my conscious self reprimanded me and told me to get it under control, the problem was I knew I wouldn't have any left if I stayed in bed with her like this so I removed myself and my dick from the equation.

Regretfully I made my way back to my own quarters.

I tried to get back to sleep but even the pain medication and cold shower I took didn't help, the ache throbbing through my cock wasn't relenting so for the first time since my teenage years I took matters into my own hands.

Stepping back into the shower I turned it up a few degrees, the hot water sliding over me was fractionally similar to the warm tingle that consumed me whenever Annie was near and with that thought my mind was saturated with images of myself indulging in her body, gripping myself firmly, stroking slowly up and down I saw her pale skin flushing pink with excitement when I brushed my fingers over her waist, her eyes dark with lust as I kissed my way down her body, nipples pebbling when I gently pulled her little panties aside and nuzzled her sex, god I bet she tastes as good as she smells, my hand moved faster and my breath grew shallower as I saw her sweet little tongue peek out and lick the tip of my cock, FUCK!

I pressed my head against the cold tile and supported myself with my left arm on the shower wall, I looked down and saw how hard I was, pre cum dripping down my hand, my head so purple, engorged, pleading for release.

Closing my eyes her mouth was on me, those berry coloured lips taking me in, all the fucking way, sucking up I felt her flick my tip again, she makes her way down and I grip her hair gently, steadying myself, thrusting slightly into her as my body gave way to its urge, she hums out deep in her throat from pleasure, I could feel it vibrating through my cock down to my balls, SHIT!

Faster, my hand was stroking so hard, I rubbed my thumb over the head spreading the natural lubricant all over myself, fuck I wanted to feel her wetness, I'm nearly there, my legs twitch, my abs roll in anticipation and my feet flex, as I close my eyes again I saw her look up at me with my cock still buried deep in her warm wet mouth, her desire is the only thing I see until I notice her hand moving rapidly underneath her white cotton panties.

FUUUUUUCKKKK! SSSSHHHIIIT! I gasped out for breath as thick streams of white hot cum shoot out of me and down my hand.

Holy fuck! I've never cum so hard or so much before.

As soon as I left the shower the guilt washed over me, for hours I tried to rationalise my reaction to her, _it's just a normal physical reaction to being stimulated, its been weeks since you've had a submissive at your disposal of course your dick would react like that, it could have been anyone rubbing their sweet ass against you and it still would have happened, you've never slept with anyone before this is probably what would happen if you did you just didn't know it, it was morning wood, you can't control that, she was sighing your name like you'd just fucked her, it must be the medication you're on it's relaxed you._

After repeating those lame ass excuses over and over again the only conclusion I could come up with was that I couldn't act on my bodies basic urges around Annie and that maybe I should entertain the thought of getting another submissive asap but as soon as that thought flickered into my head I felt nauseas and a new wave of guilt flooded me although I refused to address it.

So its been 3 days and all I've allowed myself to do is check on Annie after mealtimes and read to her as she falls asleep, all with the door open, to be honest I'm grateful for Taylor's rule because behind closed doors I doubt I would be able to control myself with her, or take the pain of not being able to touch her the way my body wants to.

Each night she falls asleep sighing my name with that cute little smile playing on her plump, inviting lips making the walk back to my own bedroom difficult trying to hide the tent in my pants, if Taylor saw it I'd be truly fucked and not in the way that would help my uncomfortable situation.

It's the 4th day and Taylor has asked albeit with an undertone of warning in his voice for me to look out for Annie as he is taking Gail out for a romantic over night stay at the Heathman Hotel, Valentines day, I'm all for consumerism but seriously what a crock of shit, it seems to me that if you love someone you shouldn't need a special day designated once a year to show them you care, but hell, what the fuck do I know, I don't even have a heart _you sure about that Grey, hmmm, not even a little one, one that beats a little faster when a certain brunette is close by?_

No, I don't have a heart, I don't do fluffy shit like that, I fuck and hard at that, I need a sub to relieve myself and soon, I'm this close to being caught with a erection every god damn night, its embarrassing I'm 23 for fucks sake and a few little sighs from Annie and I can't keep him down.

Every night I have to jerk myself off in the shower desperately trying to avoid thinking about her, no use it does, every time I think I've got a handle on it replaying my favourite playroom scenes with the best subs I've had she sneaks in and pushes me over the edge.

So here I am alone on my side of the apartment, dithering about like a loose testicle wondering which way to sway, my eyes focused on the door that leads me to her questioning myself and my resolve, I want to be around her, she's like a breath of cold crisp refreshing air, the kind that hits you as you leave an overheated shop, the kind that smacks you right in the face in just the right way, the kind you didn't expect but look forward to it happening again, yeah, just like that.

As I try to avoid the inevitable I flick through my email on my phone, one from Elena pops up,

Christian Darling, it's been too long since we last talked, I have a few things I need to speak to you about tonight, I expect to see you at your mothers Ball, I've found the perfect little treat, ready to start in a few weeks as per your request. I look forward to seeing you. Mrs E. Lincoln.

The thought of seeing Elena at the moment doesn't fill me with joy, after her little episode at the hospital I've been avoiding her calls, I'm not even sure if I'm going to take up her offer for another sub, especially with Annie here.

Before I can reply and let her know I won't be attending out of politeness I hear a loud shriek coming from behind the same door my eyes were just fixed on, as I peek through the door I see Annie in the middle of the kitchen floor sitting on her butt with her back to me, I can hear her mumbling to herself and see now that she's dropped something or spilt it as she's scooping up something and flinging it into the pan she has next to her while she furiously gesticulates as she carries on talking to herself.

"C, C, Can't you g, go one day, one frikin d, day Ana without messing something up, what is w, wr, wrong w, with meee, what am I going t, to mmmake him n, now,,, oh g, god this is such a m, mess!"

God she's so fucking cute, she still has that stutter, it seems she only loses it around me, I haven't heard her like this since the second time we met.

Knowing that I have a calming effect on her causes an ache in my chest to grow, I fucking love being the only one to hear her speak clearly, all those precise words just for my ears, I know I can fix her, I know I can help her.

Keeping myself hidden while I contemplate this situation my eyes refuse to look away from her. _she's so god damn cute and she doesn't even know it._

I can see her legs splayed out either side and her head shaking with disapproval at herself while her hands shoot out randomly with frustration between cleaning up the mess.

"W, why Ana huh, w, why, why would you d, do this, huh, g, god, one meal, y, y, you can't e, even make one m, meal without messing it up, w, why would you d, do this huh?!"

That last ramble sets me off as she raises her arms to the ceiling as if she's asking god himself and I can't help the loud chuckle that comes from me,,

as soon as it's out she twists her head round towards me and she sure as hell doesn't look happy, _shit how are you going to get through this year Grey when she looks even cuter angry!_

I can tell she's crossed her arms as she holds my gaze, "Christian,, it's not Funny!"

I'm still chuckling away and I see her eyes soften and that twitch in her lips tells me she's not really mad but she adds an audible 'Huff' sending a loose chocolate tendril of hair up out of her face for dramatic effect.

I can feel the pull again deep in me, like a magnet I start to walk to her cautiously avoiding the spilt food splattered all over the floor.

"You need some help here Annie? why were you cooking anyway?"

As I get to her she puts her arms up and there's that rush flooding my senses anytime I get to touch her.

I pick her feather light self up and settle her on the breakfast bar, her legs swinging slightly either side of me.

I have to will my hands to let her go, I almost falter when I see Annie clamp down on that bottom lip and shake her delicate little head at me. _Sweet Jesus Annie, baby, have a little mercy on me and my favourite appendage!_

I gently pull on her chin with my thumb and watch that lip slowly ease out from under her teeth, clearing my throat I ask her again,

"Don't worry about the mess Annie, I'll get it cleaned up, but seriously what were you doing cooking, you shouldn't be carrying heavy pots about!"

I spy a cloth looped through a cabinet handle and start to gently clean off the remnants of food splattered all over her tiny frame.

I am trying to concentrate on the task at hand, trying to get it done quickly so I don't end up crossing the line, but as I pull her hair aside over one shoulder and pick off the congealed pasta stuck to her neck I see a small blush make its way up her chest to the exact spot my fingers are lingering.

_So beautiful, shit, distract yourself Grey or get the fuck out now!_

Swiftly pulling my fingers away and sticking to the safe areas of her arms I ask her again.

" Well Annie? why were you cooking, I know Gail would have left you a meal, or money for pizza, hell even I would have made you something, probably a sandwich but hey its food right?"

I aim for light hearted conversation, I can't let this get heavy between us she's still healing and she's Taylor's niece, daughter or whatever and she's still definitely 17, 17 fucking years old.

She still has her head down when she starts, " Well, I um, you know I just,,,"

That's all I get before she puts her face into her hands and shakes her head again.

I can't stand the thought of her shying away from me, she could tell me anything and I would never embarrass her or think badly of her. I want her to feel like she can say anything, I don't want any barriers between us, nothing, I want all of her, _body and soul._

I step closer to her and gently place both of my palms either side of her hips and lean into her, she peaks out behind a few fingers and starts to giggle shaking her head quickly. I can't help it that sound, her laugh hits part of me that yearns for more, my face reacts before I can even register and my mouth falls into a wide grin as I gently pull her hands down, lacing my fingers in between hers I anchor them behind her which places my face just that little bit closer, I can see her freckles from here, I can smell her scent, mmmmm.

She peers up at me, even placed on the breakfast bar I still tower over her and watching her crane that slender neck to find my face satisfies the caveman in me.

" Come on Annie, why were you cooking hmmmm?"

She gazes over my face, her eyes flitting firstly from my hair, down the sides of my face, back to my eyes and then down to my lips before quickly shooting straight back up to my eyes again, fixing them there she takes a deep breath,

" I was trying, well I wanted to umm, make you a meal, to say thank you, you know for letting me stay here and well looking after me as well,, nothing fancy, it was just Mac and Cheese, but, well I ruined it." her voice grows quieter as she trails off the last few words, her gaze now looking past me, anywhere but at me as that sweet pink blush flushes her face once more.

I look away from her and survey the mess all around us, now I see it, Mac and Cheese every where, her thank you to me pasted up the kitchen cabinets splodges of it all over the floor, some of it still on her.

That ache in my body grows knowing she's tried to make me food, no one other than my mother or Gail has made me a meal before, here she is, 5ft 2, 95lbs with a leg cast on and broken fingers trying to make my favourite comfort food, for me.

" For me? you were making dinner for me Annie?"

I brush a loose piece of hair behind her ear as she nods at me.

" I'm sorry it got ruined though, I can make it again another night if you want, I really wanted to say a small thank you though and I messed up."

She finishes with a resigned sigh and I see her shoulders slump in defeat, where I couldn't be more elated, I feel my grin widen and my whole stance straightens with pride knowing she wanted to do this for me.

I look her over, trying to decide how to show her how happy she's just made me when I see a cheesy noodle stuck to the inner part of her elbow, this was dinner she made for me, I want a taste I need her to know how much this means to me.

I gently pick her arm up and lay her hand over my shoulder, she looks up at me with a confused frown _there's that adorable little v between those baby blues again_ I smile down at her, keeping my eyes on her I straighten her arm out and circle the noodle with my finger, " You made me dinner hmmm?"

I see her gulp as she nods silently, I know what I'm doing but I can't stop myself.

I lower my mouth to the noodle and place my lips over it and softly suck it onto my tongue, all my ears can hear are the soft wet sucking noises of my mouth followed by a sharp gasp, I look up to see dark blue eyes shining back at me, holding her breath until I lick the now noodle free spot clean and finish with a small kiss to her arm as I place it back by her side.

"Delicious Annie, Thank you for dinner."

"Your welcome Christian" she breaths out looking at my lips.

I slowly peel my eyes away from hers as I realise I've gone to far again but fuck was it worth it, I couldn't even taste the macaroni, my senses overwhelmed with the sweetness of her skin, like vanilla flavoured silk, _I bet her mouth tastes like vanilla pudding. _My dick throbs with need at the thought of my lips on hers and it takes all my will power to calm it down and step away.

I need to create some distance, physical distance if I'm going to keep my word so I tell her to take a quick shower and then we'll order pizza.

I help her down and catch a whiff of her hair to tide me over until she gets back and I finish tidying up the mess, each handful of dinner that I scoop and throw away causes my face to break in two with satisfaction, _ Annie did this for me, all for me. _

As I finish my stomach rumbles with hunger but all I can think is how I'd rather eat another noodle off my Annie than anything else, but pizza and soda with her watching a movie is as good as I'm going to get right now.

20 minuets later and I've found popcorn and a big bag of M&Ms in Gail's kitchen, looks like my security have a sweet tooth because I certainly don't request anything I found in that draw, I guess the sugar keeps them going on long overnight shifts.

I pour both into two big glass bowls and carry them over to the media room along with 2 tall glasses for the soda.

As I'm setting it down onto the coffee table I hear Annie calling my name, like an entranced sailor I follow her voice to the Great room, standing on the edge of the room I soak in the sight of her, she looks even smaller in this room but as she walks along the wall of glass looking out onto the sky line of Seattle I find myself thinking how good it feels to have her here, how she seems to make this massive apartment homely instead of a cold museum I've often considered it to be before.

Making my way to her she must hear me and as she turns I see a small wince cross her face and instantly my feet move faster to her.

"Hey, are you ok, do you need some painkillers?"

I grip hold of her waist and peer into her eyes desperate for her to tell me the truth, I can't stand to see her in any pain.

"Umm well actually, I think I kinda hurt my butt a little when I fell earlier and my me leg is aching a bit."

Damn it, I didn't even consider that she fell, she hurt herself whilst making me dinner, the thought of her in pain partially because of me robs me of the elation I felt earlier.

Frowning slightly I cup her face, " Don't push yourself Annie, not for anyone, especially not me, I'm not worth it, promise me you won't do that again, I can't bare you being hurt."

She holds my gaze and gently wraps her tiny hands around my wrists and softly tell me " You're worth it to me Christian so I can't promise anything."

Still holding her face I look for any sign of insincerity and I find none, there is no air left in my lungs as I accept her words, I swallow the lump that's appeared in my throat.

My nerves are scattered with her admission and although my body is screaming at me to kiss her I take a step back and see her holding a bunch of take out menus.

Following my gaze she lifts them up and shrugs while cocking her head at me.

" I don't know the good pizza places in Seattle but I found these in the kitchen and thought we could choose together,, by the way where is the T.V in here, do you have to press a button and the screen comes out of the ceiling or is it hidden behind a piece or art work?"

Still trying to maintain my cool I give her a small smile while offering my hand to her,

" No Annie, the T.V is in the media room, come on, you can choose a movie while I order dinner."

"Oh, Ok, but nothing too spicy, Oh and defiantly no anchovies."

I smile back at her " Nothing spicy and no anchovies, got it Miss Steele, any other requests?"

She stops abruptly and I see her body stiffen slightly, she looks at me and nods slowly, raising my brow at her willing her to tell me she lowers her eyes while fussing at the hem of her top,

" Could you carry me Christian, my leg really hurts."

peeking up at me through the hair that's hiding her face I see a small blush and I almost blurt out I'd carry her everywhere all day if she didn't mind but instead my brain takes over and the playful side of me escapes, quickly sweeping her into my arms I play it out as a southern gentleman " Yes Ma'am, anything you say Ma'am!"

Giggling at me she wraps her arms around my neck, " Why Thank you kind sir, now away! we have a night o' entertainment afoot."

Her laugh is infectious and her accent incredibly more authentic than mine, purposely I make each step count and relish each second she's nestled safely in my arms.

My skin instantly cools as I set her down on the over sized couch, her petite frame exaggerating the largeness of the furniture, her feet don't even touch the floor as she sinks back into the cushions.

I chuckle lightly looking at her and she seems to read my mind,

"Maybe I should change my name to Thumbelina or Tinkerbell" she giggles back at me wrapping her arms around a cushion and tucking it under her chin.

"I always wanted to be taller, but I ended up small like my Mom."

Shifting the coffee table closer to the edge of the couch so she can rest her legs on it I catch the slight tinge of sadness to her voice,

" The best things in life come in small packages Annie, you're perfect just as you are."

She doesn't respond and I can see the conflict in her face, she doesn't know how beautiful and sweet she is, _well you'll just have to show her won't you Grey._

Sitting down opposite her on the coffee table I gently pick up and rest her legs beside me, gaining a small smile from her I decide not to push her on the matter and just enjoy the next few hours with her.

Taking the menus from her I see the one for Antonio's pizzeria, the only place I know that does authentic stone baked pizzas, the one place I let Elliot take me to dinner a few years ago, if memory serves me right it was some fucking good pizza but I was wasted so who knows, either way its one of the best and Annie deserves nothing less.

" So a pepperoni and a veggi pizza hold the mushrooms?" I ask her just to make sure.

"Yep sounds good to me, oooh and ice cream, please if that's ok?"

OK? what the fuck she can have whatever she wants, she needs to eat, I know she hasn't been eating right, I can see the evidence, hell I can feel it when I carried her.

" Annie you can have whatever you want, anything ok, so what flavour do you want?"

" Vanilla please. "

_Of course she would choose vanilla, just the same as her delectable skin._

Clearing my throat and my head from that line of thought I mumble that its fine.

After placing the order I take a seat next to her,

" What kind of movie are you in the mood for? anything you want we can download it."

" I don't mind really, nothing gory though, so I guess an action or comedy?"

" Not into chick flicks then Annie?" I try and humour her, knowing the books she likes to read I would have bet on a romantic flick but she has surprised me more than anyone I've ever know so all bets are off.

"No, I mean, I do like them but I feel like laughing tonight, plus its Valentines day and it's kind of a cliché to watch chick flicks right? I'd rather laugh to the point where I nearly pee my pants to be honest!"

Part of me feel bereft that I won't get to watch her blush watching a few awkward kissing/sex scenes in front of me, but I can't deny the anticipation of waiting to see her laugh the night away, just thinking about it makes me realise I should have strapped my dick up, _tonight is going to be painful._

" Ok, so a comedy, depends on what you find funny though, so what's the one film that always gets you smiling Annie?"

I simply watch her pondering, you can see the wheels turning and then her eyes light up with an answer, " It's a stupid film, but I never get sick of watching it,"

She's almost embarrassed but I wait it out and watch as she squirms a little.

" Well?"

" Ghostbusters, I love Bill Murray, he's so dry and funny, he cracks me up, Ray used put it on to cheer me up."

There's that flash of sadness again a bittersweet memory playing through her mind and all I want to do is haul her into my lap and kiss it away.

" Ghostbusters it is then." I say to her while flicking through the film library and see its already there, _no doubt downloaded by Elliot the big kid._

Seeing it on the screen she looks over at me and smiles gratefully making my need to be closer to her grow.

Before I start the film I go and find both of our pain medication, I don't want her to miss the last lot for the night if she falls asleep and I wouldn't have the heart to wake her either.

As I'm making my way back I wonder to myself if I should turn the cameras off in the media room, not that I'm planning to cross the line but I know that if I get the chance to hold Annie again I won't deny myself and those moments are for me, _us._

As if my thoughts are being read my phone goes and I see Taylor has text me asking about Annie, putting my guilt aside I let him know we are just having dinner and giving her the last of her medication, he quickly texts back a simple thank you and reminds me what time he will be back tomorrow.

Looking through my phone again I see I have one more text from Elliott,

'_bro totally have a chick lined up for you, told her about my little bro and she loves a man with scars apparently, fuckin hot, like a total 9 1/2 red head, not sure if she's a natural but you can verify that right ;) no point getting stabbed if you don't get some pity pussy bro or should I keep my eye out for the right Guy instead?'_

Fucking Elliott, always trying to hook me up with someone, I know he doesn't really think I'm gay, he caught a sub leaving one Sunday and told me he could smell pussy from the elevator but despite me not acknowledging anything happened he continues to fish for information, he even sends me articles from Gay magazines where they question my sexual orientation. _Funny Fucker, if only he knew. _

Looking down the screen I see 2 missed calls from Elena, probably wondering why I'm not at the Valentines ball with the rest of my family, I never answered her email earlier and right now I have no head space for anything except Annie so I turn my phone off.

My body clearly misses her as I find my legs moving quicker towards the room, as I walk in I see Annie's face red with frustration bent over desperately trying to get past her leg cast and reach her foot.

" My foot is soooooo itchy, I hate this cast, I can't wait to get it off!"

Giving up she points to her leg, " 3 weeks, 3 frikin weeks and you're gone."

I can't help but chuckle at her annoyance, she's so god damn adorable when she's angry.

"Here let me help" I spin her round and rest both legs on my lap, slowly I start to scratch her foot all over, as soon as I hit the spot she was after I hear a low groan escape her throat and my skin flashes with white hot heat tingling right through me down to my groin. _Fuck this was a bad Idea, but look at her face Grey, maybe she can scratch that 4 day itch you've got. SHUT THE FUCK UP! ARGGHH! _

Making sure my dick doesn't ruin this moment and make an appearance right now I close my eyes and try to imagine the most disgusting thing I can think of, _Elliott fucking, Elliott's hairy ass, Elliott's hairy ass in drag, YEP that did it! thank fuck for that._

Annie's voice pulls me out of my own head, " You can't go back to work now Christian."

"Huh, why's that?" I ask confused as I move on to her other foot, my ministrations now more of a rub rather than scratching.

" Because you Mr Grey are now my official foot scratcher."

_No problem baby, I'll be your official foot scratcher and general lackey anytime you want._

I can't hide the smirk as I raise my eyebrow at her " Is that so Miss Steele and what do I get in return, payment if you will?"

Still laughing in between sighing when I knead a sore spot, " Anything, What do you want?"

Closing my eyes briefly my mind screams out _YOU, just you Annie, all of you._

" Anything Annie, tut, I am a business man, first rule I learnt on the job, you shouldn't offer something you can't deliver,, what if I want something you can't give?"

The air grows thicker and although I'm concentrating on her feet, her perfectly shaped small feet I can feel her eyes on me.

" I'd give you anything Christian, you've given me so much already, you make me laugh, you make me forget, you make me feel,,,, safe. I could never repay you enough for that. I've never had a friend like you before."

_Friend, there it is, that word, one meaning away from how I want her to need me._

_Friend. Something inside breaks and unexpectedly I feel like I'm grieving something I never had, it doesn't make sense but the sensation of loss is unrelenting._

_I can't turn her away now, I can't not be around her, she's still mine to protect, mine to keep safe, I can still help her, fix her, of course she wouldn't be interested in you, not only are you fucked up in every worst way she's 17, after what happened to her you really think she's thinking about guys? she probably never wants to be touched like that again and I can't blame her. No I can't be selfish with her, I'll be her friend, I'll keep her safe and hurt any fucker that mistreats her in the future, I'll never let her get hurt again, even if it means keeping this part of me hidden from her, she deserves better and that's not me._

" You don't have to repay me Annie, I've never had a friend like you either, so how about you just promise me to always be my friend even when I'm an ass and I promise to be your official foot scratcher hmm?"

" I don't know that seems awfully unfair to you Christian, I thought you were this big bad CEO who drove a hard bargain, but I'm not going to turn your offer down, who knows when a girl will come across another expert foot scratcher such as yourself."

She giggles away and just like that I'm basking in the sound and ignoring the ache of rejection deep inside.

"You know a good deal when you see it Miss Steele, and I'm the only expert foot scratcher you'll ever meet, don't wound my ego by finding someone else for the job ok?"

"Yes Mr Grey."

"Good, so you want to start the film now, we can pause it when the pizza comes, shouldn't be too long."

"Yeah sounds good to me." she nods at me going to move her feet from my lap but after the rejection I want her close so I tell her to lay down and continue to rub her toes gently desperate to prolong physical contact with her.

With one hand I quickly dim the lights and start the film, as it begins and she focuses on the screen when all I can concentrate on is her, my eyes trail up her body starting at her feet, taking in every detail from the softness of the skin on her inside ankles, how her toes are perfectly spaced, each one a little bit smaller than the last, the light dusting of hair on her legs where she hasn't shaved for a while, you can hardly see it but the light from the T.V shows it up.

Her slender legs, pale and creamy soft, I can see the dressing for her burns poking out from underneath her shorts and my body tenses in reaction knowing what is underneath and how she got them. That waist, her petite lithe body, toned but soft at the same time, the slight curve of her hip that will no doubt get rounder and even more alluring in a few years, her breasts hidden behind the cushion she's cuddling but I know they're there, not too small and not large, just a handful, just the right amount for her body, then her face, unexplainable beauty, heart shaped and framed with dark brown perfectly shaped eyebrows and a wild mane of chocolate hair, those pillow lips, dark pink and 100% kissable, I know just by looking that one taste of her mouth and I'll be hooked like a drug addict. _good thing you're just a friend though right Grey._

My thoughts end abruptly when Annie tugs on my shirt,

"Hey you want to lay down too? this couch is so comfortable"

Without thinking about it my body gives in and I slide in behind her, wrapping my arm around the same waist just moments ago I was admiring when she grabs my hand and laces her fingers through mine.

That warm tingle shoots up my arm as she presses my arm firmer against her stomach.

I re arrange a cushion behind my head so its elevated enough to watch the film although now she's thrown her cushion away all my eyes want to look at is the view from her now her body is tucked under my head and pressed against my own.

I catch a glimpse of her cleavage and quickly shut my self down, _don't torture yourself for fuck sake, keep it clean and watch the fucking movie._

I sigh to myself knowing this evening is going to be even harder than I thought.

Annie tilts her head backwards and looks at me from below, her lips are just there, just a few inches away from mine and I can't help but stare at them while she asks me if I'm ok.

She twists again so she's face to face with me, " Hey, are you ok Christian, we can watch something else if you want?"

" No, I' fine Annie, I'm good." As she smiles back at me I leave a chaste kiss on her forehead and settle back down behind her, in a few moments my eyes feel heavy and I know I'm drifting off but with Annie pressed against me I refuse to move, I feel Annie's chest raising slowly, her breathing shallow, falling asleep with me.

I stretch out my legs which awakens Annie and she slowly turns herself round and snuggles into my chest just under my neck, tucking her arms between us as I pull her flush against me, keeping her falling from the edge with my arm.

Turning down the volume I feel her rub her little button nose against my shirt while she takes a deep breath, content with how we are wrapped up in each other I slip into sleep again.

Suddenly I'm pulled from my slumber by Annie nudging my ribs,

with her voice hoarse from sleep she mumbles " Christian,, Christian, I think the pizza's here."

"Hmmmm, yeah probably," I mumble back, drawing her closer to me not wanting to move, _fuck the pizza! right here is what I need, how hard would it be to whip up some more Mac and Cheese to eat off her?_

I grin at the thought but get another nudge, " Hey, come on Mr Grey I'm hungry"

"Ok, ok, just let me wake up ok,, pizza's not going anywhere,"

As I stretch out next to her I feel her fingers slide up to under my arms and she begins to tickle me awake.

"Hey come on Grey up, this girl wants her pizza!"

Instantly I clamp my arms down and we both start squirming against each other, I manage to bend my stiff arm enough to tickle her waist.

She screams out at the contact and I feel my dick twitch at the joyful sound, unrelenting I dig in harder and slide my fingers underneath her shirt, jerking her body she calls out, " STOP, STOP, I'm gonna pee my pants Grey,, STOP, I'll pee on you!"

both streaming with tears and hiccupping with laughter we don't notice the door open.

Then there it is, the cold harsh voice that used to simultaneously turn me on and turn my blood cold,

" Well, well Christian, is this what's had you so busy you missed my calls?

How very, very disappointing."


End file.
